There’s nothing I would change about the last few months with Isa. Not a damn thing. Okay, well, maybe I would change us getting caught and her losing her job. Because that fucking sucked. And the breakup. That’s even worse. But otherwise? I can’t find it in myself to regret a single moment we had together.
I also spend way too much time looking back over the photo that became our downfall. Remembering the way I pressed the silent “I love you” into the top of her head because I couldn’t hold it in anymore.
From the moment I first saw her, she quickly wriggled her way under my skin and the more I got to know her, the more she became one of my best friends. She’s not afraid of telling me like it is, giving me shit when I deserve it, and humbling the hell out of me. She mellows out my chaotic energy. She brings out the better in me. She’s my perfect fit.
I feel myself slump further into my seat on a sigh as I raise my cup to take a sip of my latte. A hand claps down on my shoulder as I’m setting the cup back down.
“Dude, you’ve gotta stop moping about,” Cooper says as he drops into the seat across from me.
“Gee, thanks, Coop. I didn’t think to try that!” I say with sarcastic cheeriness interjected into my tone.
He throws up his hands. “Hey man, don’t shoot the messenger. We all think you need to pull your head out of your ass and get your shit together. You got dumped. So what?” He shrugs. “We all loved Isa too, but you weren’t even togetherthatlong. Could it really have made such a big impact that you’re locking yourself away for every moment of free time? There’s no fucking way.”
I stare at him for a moment, trying to decide if he seriously thinks this before I let out a sad laugh. “I can’t wait until you’re in my position. I’m going to give you so much shit.” He rolls his eyes, but I continue, “Yeah, I got dumped. But you know what hurts the most about this whole thing?”
“The fact that you were in love with her?”
“Iamin love with her. No past tense. Fully present tense in love. But no. That part doesn’t hurt. Well, not in the way you’re thinking. I wish I could regret this mess we got into. Regret her.What hurts the most is thatI don’t. Not for a single second. She’s everything I could have ever wanted in a partner. She’s strong-willed and independent, but she also has her softer side she only lets her friends see. And me. She doesn’t need me to help her with anything, but she knows I’m there and she can lean on me when she wants it. What hurts is she knows that, and yet she still felt like this is what we both needed. Instead of sitting us down and trying to work through this issue together. It was her knee-jerk reaction. Is this what she actually wanted in the end? Probably not, but it’s what she decided. And here we are.” I fall back against my chair and take another sip of my coffee.
Across the shop, the barista calls out “Alex?” and Cooper rises from his seat. I raise an eyebrow at him in question.
He shrugs. “I don’t like using my real name since I come here all the time. Plus, it’s my middle name so it’s technically not a lie.”
“Whatever you say, man.”
As he walks away, I track Cooper’s movements through the shop, because something about the way he straightened up before leaving our table has me on high alert. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something about him changed.
I watch as he leans over the counter to speak to the auburn-haired barista from earlier. I watch as she bites back a smile, and her cheeks start to turn pink. She says something back that has him running his hand through his hair, mussing it up. It’s almost like he’s… nervous? But that doesn’t seem right. Cooper could talk any girl into his bed in sixty seconds flat. And has. He’s never nervous around a girl.
He grabs his drink from the counter with a smile before he heads back over to our table. His face is tilted to the floor, but I can just barely make out that the tips of his ears are tinged pink.
“Well, that was interesting,” I say with a smirk as I lean back in my seat, crossing my arms over my chest.
“What was?” he asks as he slides back into his seat.
“Looks to me like you’ve got a little crush on the barista.”
He scoffs. “I do not.”
“Oh yeah?” I lift a brow.
“Yeah.”
“Certainly didn’t look like it from where I was sitting.”
“Yeah, well I’m in here at least three times a week usually. We’re friendly.”
“So, you’re friends then?”
“No, not friends.Friendly. I’ve only lived around the corner for two months. I don’t even know her. We just have random chats in passing. Super surface level. Nothing like friends.” The more he tries to explain away the interaction, the more flustered he seems and I’m enjoying watching him squirm.
“What do you even talk about in these passing chats?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know. Stuff. The weather. Her classes.”
“Classes?”
“Yeah, I think she goes to the college nearby. I’ve caught her studying when I’ve been in and the shop is empty.”
