Hud
“No advice?” I ask Sawbones about my Charlie’s Angel crying in the shower.
“She thought you were kidding?”
I don’t want to say this but it’s new and my Sophia deserves me at least asking. “Yeah, she was surprised I meant it.”
Teller shows between us and Sawbones almost trips. I shake my head at the doctor who always told me to be cool. Teller smiles. “Justice said you need some old lady advice.”
“Ol’ lady without the D here.”
“Yeah, that. New England says old. What’s up. Sophie is level headed and confident if a little stunned with the speed you all happened.”
I stop and turn. “She pulled out the questions, said she needed it for us to go further.” All I need is Badass thinking Iplayed her.
“Relax, Brother. We’re readers and we get military honor with your Officer oath thing. Cort loves elite because of that oath and honor.”
I face forward and start walking again. “She cried when I washed her. I’d ignore it but I felt hurt from her. Ignoring that isn’t understanding it.” It will get bigger or show in different ways. A magic reader can help with that.
Teller nods, I guess he read all that. “She was dropped at an Indian school as a baby but she’s not Indian. She grew up in care. No one wanted a kid that was self-sufficient and that caused her to depend on herself for everything. She didn’t trust adults. Older she enlisted and followed orders until they started ordering for her personal life. No one took her reports as real so she retired instead of re-enlisting. They wanted her in training but they never fixed the problem on the job so she refused.”
I don’t get it. “So doing things for her hurts her?”
“No, Brother. Never feeling it before you is what hurt her. This is new. She needs time to build the trust she’s feeling into a solid foundation. She knows it’s with you but never given a bath hit her hard. She’s never had anyone who gave a shit. Military didn’t do it for her. If anything, they reinforced that she’s on her own. Mucimi gave her the list to show her what normal should look and feel like.”
My feet stop and breath catches. With my eyes on the colorful old Bit house that’s a daycare now, I think about being 4, 5, 6 or 12 and 13 with no one who gives a shit. How does a kid live like that. Self-sufficient wasn’t a trait she was born with; it was learned because no one gave a shit. Her JF2, or whatever level, was because she had the chemical background, training to think on the go under fire. She had no one and nothing to come home for. I nod. I took military and never looked back. I’d have been in jail and probably ruined my life if I didn’t. She took militaryfor the bond that she learned wasn’t meant for her. She went into training seeing they wanted her gagged but handing them her notes. Badass showed her more. I can do that. I can give her more.
Looking around I realize they stopped too. “Badass showed her family. I can do that.”
Sawbones laughs.
Teller hits my shoulder. “Wecan do that, Brother. Asa asked Justice to heal her. She doesn’t need healing but a hand to learn what family is and how she fits here. She does her part at every Club she’s been in but doesn’t connect or doesn’t know how to. A lot of Brothers don’t without realizing it, so she’s not alone in that. Being new, you can help with that connection. Everyone wants to meet you and ol’ lady meet days are at every Club. Someone will invite you or Sophie, go to the different Clubs then to her friends Clubs. We work to keep track of Brothers but you’ll have to watch for the Brother that’s watching out for her.” His hand goes up before a word of protest comes out of my mouth. “This isn’t someone interested in her, it’s someone watching her six when you’re not close. It could be a friend, team member or friend of yours. Like Asa asking Justice to heal her, it’s someone looking out for her.”
I nod. “But not Asa? He’s closest to her.”
He thinks about that and nods walking toward the letter house again. “Mucimi said it’s not Asa.”
I roll eyes at him. “Ask Mucimi who it is so we’re not fuckin’ guessing.”
Sawbones barks out a laugh. We just watch him. “Is she like you? I can be a shield.”
A shield. Where did I hear that before? My eyes snap to Teller. “That’s a thing, a shield.”
“Yeah, how do you know that, both of you have heard it?”
“Tyson said it, then Spano said his old lady has a shield.It was a story. One was a Bit the other a Brother. An Officer.” I flick my fingers at my head. “I read it or heard it. Old ladies have a shield. Maybe Hemy but he doesn’t have an old lady.”
He watches me. “You said old with the D. Spano says ol’ he’s from here.”
I nod. “Maybe I read it or it’s a story from Badass Lessons. I got a lot of those.”
Sawbones looks confused. “From who?”
I shrug. “Mail call. In the mail once a month. I have a book of them. All mailed from US, some California, some Boston or Virginia. Oh, one time Ohio.”
“The Rescue Club had weird shit with those states and New York. Ask Keylan or Wolf.” Teller is sending out alert warnings.
I nod so they see it and keep walking to get away from all that. “I will. Maybe invite them for a dinner.”
