“Do you miss him?” Zayd asks, the defeat in his eyes reaching his voice.
“Of course.”
“He is a good man, Layla. I do not believe he wanted to hurt you. He only wants what is best for you.”
“And he thinks you are what is best for me. Makes your opinion kind of biased, doesn’t it?” I ask.
“I suppose so. But it does not mean what I say is not true.”
“You’re right. Sutton is a good man. He respects you because you respect him. That’s the way he’s always operated. That’s why this is so hard. I’m having trouble not seeing this as disrespect. I vowed to be faithful to Sutton. The circumstances of the world have changed, but my view of morality hasn’t. How do I make this okay in my own mind? How can I convince myself that I’m not cheating on my husband?”
Zayd shifts on the bed to face me. “I believe Sutton sees it as a matter of safety. That is how we justify most things we do. We weigh everything against the safety of our omegas. We will do anything and everything to keep them safe. That is what Sutton wants for you. He only wants to keep you safe.”
“Then why did he leave?”
“You call it a cliché, but nothing else would answer your question more correctly… He is only human.”
“Too true.”
We sit, staring at the small space between us. Every few seconds, I dare to flick my eyes to see if he’s looking at me. Part of me wants him to just tackle me and force his mark on me. Though… I’m not exactly sure what he needs to do. Does it have to be sex? Or is there another way?
Zayd finally breaks the awkward silence, “If you are not ready to let me scent mark you…”
“What exactly does it involve?” I ask.
“It depends on how strong you want the mark to be. How long do you want it to last before having to be marked again?”
“Is there a way to do it once and be done?”
Zayd stiffens. “Yes.”
For the first time in weeks, I feel a small seed of hope that blooms into a smile on my lips. “Then we should do that.”
Zayd smiles too, but sadly. “That would require me to claim you, Layla. That is the one and only permanent mark.”
That bloom of hope shrivels and dies. “Oh. Right. I guess I’m asking the wrong question then. Um… What is the least intrusive way?”
Zayd touches his finger to one cheek and then the other, at the corners of his mouth. “We have scent glands here and here. I can rub my scent on the pulse in your neck and wrists. Those areas will take my scent the best, and the heat of your body at those points should be enough to project it.”
“Should be?” I ask, nerves boiling in my stomach.
“It would be more potent, more effective if I were to rub my mark on the insides of your thighs.”
An image pops into my mind of his head between my legs, and slick dampens my panties.
“Shit. I’m sorry,” I say, when Zayd squeezes his eyes shut and grits his teeth after sniffing the air through flared nostrils.
Zayd growls, turning and gripping the edge of the bed. “Never apologize for your slick, Omega. I am honored that it flows for me. Though I know you wish it would not.”
“That is what I’m sorry for, Zayd. I’m so sorry that I can’t be your omega. Maybe we shouldn’t do this. My heat is suppressed. I can order in everything I need. It’s not like I can’t survive here without your mark. And I chose this life. I chose not to be faithful to my husband even though he abandoned me. But you did not choose any of this. And you shouldn’t be forced to give up the chance to claim your mate. To be with an omega you can ravage when she gets slick for you. It’s not right. It’s not fair.”
“I cannot explain it, Layla, but I know I am not meant to be with anyone else. I understand your guilt, but I promise you, it is not necessary. I have chosen to be here because this is where I want to be. With you. In whatever way you allow.”
With a soft huff of a laugh and raised brows, I say, not entirely believing him, “Okay, then. I’m not sorry?”
“I am pretty sure you are lying, but… good,” he says with a wry smile that shows only one of his pearly fangs.
“So… Where were we?”
