I sighed, pinching the fingertips of my glove, yanking it off, and hanging it over the railing next to the full coffee mug. When did I make that? I couldn’t remember. It was probably cold now, anyway.
Hands shoved in my pockets, I headed out front just as the silver car skidded to a stop at the top of the driveway. Harry had snuck up the mountain in his mum’s old junker. The car door slammed shut, and his sneakers pounded the concrete. Speeding up. Getting closer. A second later, I saw him, his cheeks red and his mouth set in a snarl.
All he sneered was,“You.”
His fist flew straight for my face.
Forgotten instincts kicked in. Time slowed down. Harry swung. I dodged. With nothing to hit, his arm flailed, and the momentum of the lost blow threw him forward, his feet twisting, whirling him around like a tornado.
I waited.
The blur of his fist reared back, his legs pumping as he charged forward, ready to take a second shot. I dropped my shoulder, and pain exploded across my chest when he barrelled into me. But he was clumsy and untrained and hit me like a car slamminginto a brick wall. Flying backwards, he landed with a thud on the concrete.
Spread-eagled on his back, Harry coughed, his chest heaving. I stooped over him. Defiant eyes glared up at me, and when I offered my hand to help him up, he slapped it away.
His gaze was wary. “Where’d you learn those frigging ninja moves?”
I lifted a shoulder. “Nowhere.” I hadn’t shared much about my past, and now certainly wasn’t the time to skip down memory lane. “You want to tell me what’s going on?”
“You knowexactlywhat’s going on.” He scrambled to his feet, his body twitchy, still ready to fight. “This is aboutLola.”
I flinched. Harry knew. It shouldn’t have surprised me. Gossip spread like venom in this town. I’d bet his phone blew up with every sordid detail the second he drove back in range.
“Mate—”
“Don’t youdarecall me that,” he spat. “I looked up to you. Like abrother. Like a”—emotion cracked his voice—“like afather. And what are you? Huh? Nothing but acoward!”
“You don’t understand…” The words were weak even to my ears.
“No. I don’t. Everyone in this town thinks I’m as dumb as a bag of rocks. Maybe I am. I never finished high school. I don’t readbookslike you do. But I’m smart enough to know what you did to Lola was wrong.”
I kicked a bit of gravel with the toe of my boot. “I was protecting her.”
“Protecting her?” Harry’s eyes bulged.“Protectingher? Do you hear yourself?” He snorted with disgust. “I suppose you were protecting Lola when you threw her pie in the bin, too? And when that asshole Evan Barnes said all that ugly shit to her? Sure. And then you have the damn balls to tellherto stay away fromyou!”
My eyes snapped up, and he scoffed a laugh.
“Yeah, that’s right. Hollyoak told me everything. You weren’t protecting Lola.” His hand landed flat on my shoulder, and he shoved me hard, but I didn’t budge. “You were protectingyourself.”
I took a steadying breath and dropped my gaze to my feet. Harry saw more than he should have. But he was right. I’d convinced myself the reason I’d ripped Lola’s heart out and squashed it beneath my boot was because I couldn’t let her get too attached to me. But that wasn’t it at all, was it? I’d been scared that I was already too attached to her. I had been since the second I’d laid eyes on her.
“Say something, you coward!” Harry demanded.
“There’s nothing to say.”
“Gutless!”
I nodded. Yeah. I was.
“Why are you doing this?”
“Me… Lola… It’s just not…” I rubbed my hand over the ache throbbing deep in my chest. “It can’t happen.”
“But you like her.”
The ache gnawed deeper. Idid. Too much. If I lingered in my fantasies too long and let Lola’s sweet smile lure me into believing I was worth being loved, I’d break her beyond repair. I wasn’t…right. My mind was a prison, but I’d lost the keys years ago. Escape was impossible. I couldn’t risk hurting her any more than I already had.
“I don’t like her,” I lied.
