Dread prickled in tiny spikes all over my skin. He avoided my eyes as much as he avoided my question. He’d mentioned so many times that he wanted to protect me. Was that what he thought he was doing now? Was that what he’d tried to do before?
“Was the worst at my place?” I urged him cautiously.
“You…have a clock…”
“Is that why you left that night?”
“Lola, I wanted to stay. I’m usually so careful, but that night…” His fist clenched by his side. “I was so damn selfish. I ignored all the signs because all I wanted was to be with you, but… I stayed too long…” Frustrated, angry with himself, he thumped his fist into his thigh. “Everything went to shit. When the flashbacks get bad, I don’t always know where I am or what I’m doing. I can’t stop the memories. They’re everywhere.Everything.I’ve lashed out before. Smashed stuff. Come back to the present with bruises on my hands.” His eyes were almost wild again, and his breath was jagged, coming too fast. “I couldn’t risk anything happening to you.”
“Hey, it’s okay…” I ran gentle fingers down his neck. The tension in his jaw eased. “If this is too much, we can stop. We can talk about something else. Anything you want. Ruth’s quest for victory. Harry earning the love of the Sunshine Princess.” I slapped my hands against my knees. “Hey, now, what about that cricket match last week?”
I had absolutely no idea about cricket, and Aiden knew it. A smile ghosted on his lips.
“Is your offer still open?” He swallowed heavily and glanced an apprehensive look over my shoulder to the door.
No one was there. Only the dulled beats of music drifting from the bar filled the silence of the bathroom. I finally understood. He was scared, still chained dangerously close to another flashback.
“I don’t think I’m ready to go back yet.” He confirmed my suspicion with a sad smile. “Maybe we can go outside for a few minutes. Shake the last of it.”
I gave him my answer by lacing my fingers through his, and I tugged him away from the basin.
Aiden’s eyes rounded, but he followed on unsteady feet. Every few steps, his gaze locked on our linked hands, his brows knitted together, confused, like he couldn’t believe it. I floated along beside him. A shy blush crept up my cheeks. Maybe I couldn’t believe it, either.
After we pushed through the side doors, the noise of the bar drifted further away. I wobbled along in the silly heels Brooke had chosen for me, trying not to sink into the grass as we followed the worn stone pavers to the garden.
I sat on one of the wooden benches and patted the spot next to me. Aiden stared at my hand. Then he stared at me. He didn’t budge. I tapped my palm on the bench again. With a wary glance from the corner of his eye, Aiden eased down beside me.
“This isn’t how I wanted tonight to go,” he said.
“It hasn’t all been bad. Ruth’s kicking butt at this Games Night thing. I’m certain she’s going home with that pamper hamper she’s had her eyes on.”
“She hates all that stuff, you know. Skin care and bath bombs—that’s forgirls.” He smiled and bumped my shoulder. “She wants that one because it’s the biggest.”
I laughed. “Okay, well, what about how you helped Harry?”
Aiden grunted. “I should’ve kept my trap shut. All those dopey grins and the kissing and the squealing.” He pretended to beannoyed, but I could see the smile in his eyes. “I had no idea that pair would be so…”
“Nauseatingly happy?”
“Yeah.” His smile suddenly faded, and his eyes flickered uneasily between my face and his hands. “Those are all good things, but… I wish…” He trailed off, finishing his thoughts only with a shake of his head.
“What?” I prompted gently with another bump to his shoulder.
A splash of warmth darkened his cheeks. “I wish… I’d asked… if you’d dance with me.”
My stomach dipped like I was already dancing. “I would’ve said yes.” I grimaced. “But I wasn’t kidding when I said I have more left feet than Ryan.”
“Barb’s years of forcing all those dance recitals didn’t help, huh?”
I grimaced. “The dance school eventually asked her very gentlynotto bring me back.”
“What about a slow waltz? I could teach you,” he offered. “If you want to give it a try?”
“Now?”
Aiden’s chin dipped. His silent yes.
He braced his hands on his knees, stood up, and pulled his phone out of the back pocket of his pants. A few swipes and taps at his screen, and music floated around us, soft and slow, like dandelion seeds disappearing on the night air. He offered his hand to me, and the guarded hope in his eyes bloomed into a satisfied smile when I rested my palm in his.
