I can’t get my voice louder than a whisper. “Please.” I have absolutely no right to ask this, but… “Not Kristen.”
His arm drops from my shoulders. “Fuckin’ hell, Elsie.”
“Choose to be with anyone but her.”
Sawyer drags his hands down his face. “I don’t know whether to be livid that you think I’m fuckin’ a woman who treats you like trash, or…”
“Or?”
“Or to be elated that you’re jealous about how wrong you are.”
“Am I wrong?”
“Of course you fuckin’ are. Kristen showed me some kindness a while back when I was dealin’ with some personal shit. She got me involved in the community center and I’ll tolerate her because of that, but I would never, ever go near her.”
“But the other night…at the center…”
“She was annoyin’ the absolute shit out of me, but I didn’t have the patience to tell her nicely to leave me alone like I usually do. You see…” His index finger tips my chin up to make sure I’mlooking straight at him. “There’s this woman I’m sweet on who’s been playin’ hard to get.”
“I’m not playing. None of this is a game to me. And she said that you—”
“She’s lyin’, Elsie.”
I bite down on my lip. Of course, I know that, but the idea of it still hurts. “I was so stupid.”
“You’re the smartest damn person I know.”
“But not when it comes to you.”
“See, you just keep provin’ me right.”
I hiccup a laugh as I trace the line of his jaw. I miss the rough prickle of his beard when I’m wearing these silly satin gloves. His eyelids droop, heavy, and his breathing shallows, but he keeps his hands clawed on his knees.
He’s always waiting for me.
I bend forward. “Say no…”
“Yes.”
I giggle. “Sawyer.”
“If you’re plannin’ on kissin’ me, I’m sayin’ yes.”
My hand cups his cheek. “I like kissing you very much.” He has gorgeous lips.
“Then what are you waitin’ for?”
Whatisholding me back?
Self-doubt. Fear. But I know he wants me. He told me.
Sawyer groans when my lips brush over his, but he stays ramrod straight, propped against the edge of the desk. I glance down. His knuckles are white. How much control does he have? I want him to let go and paw at me, raw and unrestrained, like the first time.
I kiss the corner of his mouth. “You can kiss me better than that.”
“Can I?”
“Mmhmm.” I slide my hand up the front of his shirt. His heart pounds under my palm. “I want it like at the beach.”
