Their eyes met, and he closed the distance between them. His lips found hers, the faint scratch of his stubble against her skin sending shivers through her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling herself closer to him.
He met her pressure with his own, deepening their kiss. The heat of him against her drove all thought from her mind. She kissed him, losing herself in it completely as his muscles tensed against her touch.
When they broke apart, they were both breathless, his eyes as dark as the night sky. Harriet tidied her hair. “I should go.”
She glanced behind her, hoping he would hear the question in her voice. When she looked at him, his face was turned from her. “I suppose it is late.”
She nodded.I want to stay. Ask me to stay.
She felt him lean towards her, and thought he was going to kiss her again, but instead he brushed his lips gently against her cheek.
She walked towards the door.
“Harriet.” She whipped around at the sound of his voice.
“Yes?” Her heart sped up, he was going to ask. She knew it.
“Good night.” His words were like a dagger.
“Good night, Theodore.” She felt something inside her shatter as she turned away.
CHAPTER 24
Theodore shut the door behind Harriet, knowing that if he did not, the tenuous hold he had on his self-control would slip entirely and he would ask her to stay with him. And she could not want that. She’d asked to go, after all.
He had nearly lost it when she had walked away from him, her name escaping his lips. He had felt the words well up within him as her eyes glistened in the firelight.
Stay. Please.
The words had stuck in his throat; he could not tell if it was a blessing or a curse. All he could say was goodnight and watch her leave.
“If she wanted to stay, she would have. She would have asked.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I do not want to frighten her.”
He looked back towards the door, his fingers tracing a line across his chest where her body had pressed against him. Every part of him felt taut as a bowstring, ready to spring into action.
He took a step towards the door, hand outstretched and shook his head. It was foolish. If he went after her now, it would spoil everything. He gritted his teeth and thumped his hand hard against the wall, feeling the stone bite into his skin. He leaned his head against the cold wall.
It did nothing to soothe the fire in his veins.Is it any wonder she wanted to leave?He had probably scared her. He had grown complacent, too used to her by his side.
Had he misread her casual touches? What did it mean? Why had she come to his room?And why did I want her to stay?He pushed himself off the wall and flopped onto his bed, staring at the dark ceiling above him.
“It was not supposed to be like this.” He punched the pillow beside him into a more pleasing shape. “This was just supposed to be for Phoebe. That is all.”
He sat up a little straighter, his blood still thundering through his body. The feel of her in his arms, her lips against his clung to him like a blanket. He knew he should shake it off, that he should not encourage this, but he could not.
He thought of the day they had spent together. The way she made him feel; the way she made it so that he and Phoebe could be in the same room. Not just in the same room, but able laughand smile and even talk. He stared out at the window into the inky blackness of the night sky beyond. “It was… It was like…”
Like we were a family.
The words made everything in him tense, even as some part of him purred in satisfaction. When had he had a day like this one? Had he ever? He massaged a hand over his chest, feeling it rise and fall with every breath.
“A family,” he whispered to himself.
It was ridiculous. He knew that. It was not what they had agreed, not what he had offered. And yet, he knew a part of him wanted it. He wanted them to be a family. A part him believed that perhaps, just maybe, she did too.
“What about Rose?” He felt cold seep through his veins, dousing the fire within him.
His treacherous mind was so used to turning from Rose, that of course it turned to Harriet instead. He could picture a future, Harriet and Phoebe laughing and playing. It made him smile even as a part of him roiled, the image of a rose wilting in the background.
