Her parents exchanged a worried look, though Harriet could tell they were trying to hide it from her. The sight made her feel guilty and somehow more alone. “I am unused to the bed. I am sure I will adjust in time.”
“Of course.” Her father’s eyes flicked downwards, and Harriet realized that she had been playing with her wedding ring.
She stopped and put her hand on her lap, out of sight.
“You plan on being here for some time then?” Lady Devonmere asked, her voice a little too casual as she poured everyone more tea. “You did not mention how long you wished to stay when you arrived.”
“A little while, yes.” Harriet swallowed as her mind threatened to turn back to Theodore. “Unless it is a bother.”
“It is no skin off our nose, Harriet.” Her mother’s smile did not hide the worry lines at the corners of her eyes. “You will always be welcome here.”
“Thank you,” Harriet said, her eyes drifting to the window.
The London sky was overcast and grey. It had been the same as she had left Irondale Hall. Her insides solidified as sheremembered the carriage trundling along, the way it had felt like her heart was being quartered with each step the horses took.
She had forced herself not to look back. She knew she would only look for Theodore and that he would not be there. She could not face it.
“Well, if you will be staying here a while, I ought to make sure we have all your favorites in the house.” Her father was tapping his foot on the floor beneath the table, then he clapped his hands together and stood up so fast that he nearly upset the tablecloth. “I know, perhaps some biscuits? Yes, biscuits. Or shortbread? Both. I shall have Cook make some and you can snack on them throughout the day.”
Her father did not give her time to object, he practically ran out of the room, calling over his shoulder. “Oh and scones? I think scones, and maybe some jam. And cream.”
“He really does not need to go to such trouble.” Harriet forced herself not to chase after her father.When he is worried, he tries to feed the problem away.“I suppose I should be relieved he has not suggested cake.”
“That is because he already spoke to Cook about it this morning. You know how he gets when he worries.” Her mother drummed her fingers against the table.
“He must be very worried if we are already at cake.” Harriet glanced in the direction her father had left, guilt surging forwards in her chest.
“He is.” Her mother dabbed at her mouth with a napkin, fixing Harriet with a serious look. “We both are.”
“You do not need to be. I am fine.” She tried to wave her mother’s concern away.
She could practically hear her mother’s unasked question. In truth, Harriet was surprised she had managed to restrain herself from asking it for so long.
“Harriet, please do not lie to me. You are the furthest thing from fine. My eyes may not be what they once were, but I would have to be blind not to see that you have been crying.” Her mother leaned towards her and took Harriet’s hand in her own. “You arrived days ago, and we have tried to be patient, but really, there are limits. You are distraught, your husband is nowhere to be seen… What on Earth is going on?”
“I… It is nothing.” Shame blocked Harriet’s throat.
How could she tell her what a fool she had been? Her mother rushed into fill the silence. “Marriage can be difficult, and especially in such unusual circumstances. I am sure that whatever happened between you and the Duke can be smoothed over. If he sent you away we can-” Harriet cut her mother off. “- he did not send me away.”
“Oh. Well, that is good.” The surprise on her mother’s face hit Harriet with the force of a bullet. “That will make it much easier to sort out whatever has happened between you two. I am sure, if you just clear things up, everything will be right as rain.”
“You think it is my fault.” Harriet felt numb all over. “You think… You think I am to blame for all of this?”
“What? No.” Her mother shook her head vehemently.
Harriet did not remember getting to her feet, but she towered over her mother, hugging her arms to her chest. “I could see it on your face. You were surprised! You think that I did something for him to send me away! Of course you do, why would you not?”
“I only meant that you showed up unannounced, distraught. I thought perhaps he-” her mother tried to explain but Harriet cut her off“- I was the one who chose to go. I did not… He did not send me away.”
“But why?” Lady Devonmere chewed on her lip. “Everything seemed to be going so well! Why would you leave?”
Because he would not ask me to stay.
The thought felt too pathetic for her to voice. Harriet shook her head. “I do not want to talk about it. It does not matter now anyway. What is done is done.”
“Nothing is ever set in stone, especially not when it comes to matters of the heart.” She was on her feet too, her arms outstretched as though to pull her close and hug her. “Please, Harriet, tell me what happened. I want to help. I am sure we can… That we could figure out some way to fix things between the two of you.”
“There is nothing to fix.”Theodore made that clear.Harriet moved away from her mother’s outstretched arms. “There never was.”
