The candlelight flickered against something shiny wrapped around her neck. Luke’s eyes naturally settled on the jewelry, and as they did, he discovered it was a familiar piece. “You are wearing the necklace I gave you.” His words were hesitant and slow.She was wearing the necklace! What did that mean?He had not seen her wear it since the night he gave it to her.
“Yes,” Clara answered with a smile and nothing more.
News had come that Papa’s headstone was completed, and the family walked to the churchyard together. The path to the cemetery was actually quite pleasant. The sun had come out again, and the Merritts enjoyed catching up with one another as they trudged through the slightly damp grass. At first, Mother and Clara walked in front, with Luke and John behind, but about halfway through, Mother insisted she needed time with both of her children, so Clara and John swapped places.
The group grew somber as they entered the churchyard and looped around the back to the Merritt family cemetery. It was not a place Clara had been to very many times. The grass stood long and green between the headstones, and as they passed the row of deceased family members, Clara felt Papa’s absence much greater than she did most days. He truly was gone, buried beneath her feet along with all the earls before him. Her sadness bubbled to the surface again, and Luke immediately pulled her under his arm, offering her one of his white handkerchiefs.
By the time they reached Papa’s stone, the whole family was crying and holding each other, each consumed in their grief. John squatted down and ran a hand across the memorial, making sure the craftsmanship was sufficient. It had been five months since Papa’s passing, but this day was arguably more sad than the dayhe had died. They had time to miss him, to feel what life was like without him there.
But unlike that first day, they had learned to rally around each other. Luke supported Clara. Clara supported John. John supported Mother. The circle of love never ended. With each of them caring for the other, eventually, the crying lulled, and Lady Merritt spoke. “Matthew would be happy to see us all together.”
“I miss him,” John whispered, and they all agreed. Soon, they were telling stories, both happy and sad, about times with Papa. John shared lessons he had been taught on horseback, and Clara talked about her bedtime stories.
When it was Luke’s turn, he reminisced, “The first summer I was here,” he gestured back to the house, “my mother accompanied me, and she was very particular about my behavior.” The other three nodded in agreement. They all remembered Avianna’s paranoia. “Lord Merritt took pity on me, and would sneakily give me small pleasures from time to time. He invited me into his office once, told Mother it was a financial lesson, but then we played cards.” The Merritts laughed. Papa had always been good at keeping people happy.
Finally, it was Lady Merritt’s turn. “I have many memories of my husband.” She took a long, laborious breath, and Clara placed an encouraging hand on her elbow. “I think my favorite was seeing him become a father.” She looked up at John, tears in her eyes. “Your Papa was always a good man, but loving you,” she looked around the circle, “all three of you, made him a great, happy man.” They all hugged each other again, offering words of comfort.
They stayed for a few more minutes, before Mother announced she was ready to walk back. “I would like a minute alone,” Clara told the group. Luke offered to accompany her when she was done, and Mother and John went together. The baron rested against a nearby tree, giving Clara privacy as she knelt down next to her father’s final resting place. “Hello, Papa,” she whispered. “We are doing better now.” She thought of how horrible those first few weeks had been, and yet how hopeful she had felt since. “It is hard still, but we are slowly finding ways to be happy again. John is back, and he’s been working hard. A little too hard, if you ask me.” She placed a hand on top of the large stone. “Mother seems happy enough, and she was so excited when I told her about Luke.” Clara smiled. “I love him. Iimagine I will marry him. I know that is what you wanted. It has just taken me a while to realize it is what I wanted, too. But he is my best friend, and he makes me happy. I am not sure why I didn’t see it before.” She looked over at Luke then. His eyes were closed as he rested against the tree, and she pictured that scrawny little boy from long ago. She and Luke had thousands of memories, and she looked forward to making a thousand more. “I really do love him,” she whispered. “I think I always have.”
Chapter 32
Nothing to Tell
Clara spent most of the week on her embroidery. Still, Luke ensured they had some alone time each day. About halfway through the week, he received a note under his bed chamber door.
Take her to the nursery.
There were only a few options as to who penned the note, all of which he trusted, so that day, Luke walked Clara up to the nursery. She opened up about memories from her childhood. There were some silly stories of her and John and some fond memories of her father.
The next day, another note appeared, this one telling Luke to take Clara out riding. Luke happily obliged. Each day, he was given different suggestions on how best to court her. They read in the library, looked at portraits in the picture gallery, rode to town for a little shopping, and took long walks through the garden. Their friendship was growing exponentially, and at times, Luke wondered if there was something more, but he didn’t push things. He did not want to scare Clara away.
After a week, came the final note:Now ask her what she wants.
That day, Clara requested a simple chat while she embroidered. The day after that, she asked to ride into town for more thread. The third day, she had a rather specific request. “Luke?” She asked, “Will you sing to me?”
Luke enjoyed singing alone or in the church congregation, but had never done so for a personal audience. “What would I sing?” He did his best to hide the panic in his voice.
“Joy to the World,” she answered quickly. “I heard you sing it once. It was so lovely.”
That didn’t sound too painful.“And where shall this performance take place?” he wondered.
“In the ballroom.”
So Clara and Luke entered the empty ballroom. “I have never been in this room before,” Luke realized. It was a gigantic space, with full length mirrors on the wall and large, crystal chandeliers. One wall boasted several multi-story windows, and Clara pulled their drapes back to let in the light.
“I used to do my dance lessons in here,” she reminisced. “I still remember my first lesson. Mother and Papa came to watch, but then they randomly danced with each other. No real music or anything.”
Her voice held a hint of sadness, but it was meant to be a happy memory, and Luke hoped to remind her of such. He reached for her hand, just as he would at a true ball, and led her out onto the floor. Her smile was instantaneous, and it left him with a satisfied feeling as they began to dance. They spun and stepped and pulled each other close. It was not a choreographed dance, and Luke did not know if he was leading, or if Clara was. They just seemed to know what the other person wanted, anticipating their next move without a conscious thought.
Clara looked beautiful. A few days before, the family had moved into half-mourning. So while she still wore dark gloves and a subdued hairstyle, her black dress had been traded for a navy one. It was lovely, but the effect it had on Clara’s mood was the real champion. Everyday, she was just a bit happier.
They reached a natural end to their movement. Luke stepped backward, to bow, but Clara gripped his hand, webbing her fingers through his. “Do you know what they did at the end of the dance?” she whispered. Luke held his breath as he looked down at their interlocked fingers. She moved in closer. “After the dance, they kissed.”
His heart raced.Was this it? Was Clara finally allowing them to be something other than friends?“And what did you think of kissing in the ballroom?” he asked, unintentionally bending his head toward her.
Clara tipped her chin upward. “I thought it sounded nice.”
Luke moved in slowly, giving her plenty of time to change her mind, but Clara seemed more than willing.She wants to kiss you. The thought was very encouraging. He placed a hand at the back of her neck and gently slid closer. Just before their lips made contact, Walters, the butler, came rushing into the room. “Lady Clara!” he announced in alarm, “Your betrothed is here!”
