“So, to get us started, I’m going to have you come stand right over here.” Sadie waves me over to the screen. “Your partner for today’s session is on the other side. I’ll get you both to close your eyes then I’ll move the screen, but please keep your eyes closed. You’ll stand back-to-back and turn around when I give you the go ahead. Sound good?”
I nod and Sadie peeks around the other side. I close my eyes and a few seconds later I hear Sadie folding up and dragging the screen away.
“Okay, you come here.” Sadie pulls on my hand, and I shuffle to where she wants me. “Perfect. Now, you go here.” I hear shoes scuffling behind me. I rub my palms on my dress.
“I want you to reach back a bit and find each other’s hands.”
Soft skin touches the tops of my hands. Fingernails draw patterns against my skin. I open my fingers and allow her quiet, slow exploration. After a moment, she links our hands together and I give her a gentle squeeze.
I have no clues about who this person is other than the sliver of high heels I spotted under the screen, the softness of skin, and what feels like properly manicured fingernails. I’m guessing it’s a woman, which sends a thrill through me. I haven’t been with a woman since my first year of university. Yes, I flirt with Tracy at the diner, but I haven’t touched her. Haven’t been closer than my arm grazing her sleeve as I pass her a meal.
“Alright, I’ll count down from three and you’ll both turn around at the same time. Three.”
I suck in a breath, hold it, and slowly release it.
“Two.”
I gulp.
“One.”
We let go of one hand and turn together, like we’re doing a waltz. I keep my eyes closed, not quite ready to see her.
“Like Sadie said,” says a voice so soft and light I wonder for a moment if I died and she’s an angel. “You’re beautiful. I’m Valerie.” She squeezes my hand and my eyes pop open.
“Hi Valerie,” I squeak, aware of my face reddening. “I’m Ella.”
Valerie’s blue eyes hold my brown ones. Her pink, glossy lips tip up in a smile so devastating my knees go weak.
She has long blonde hair that looks like poured sunlight. An angel indeed. It’s straight, not a single piece out of place or floating around like my hair. She’s shorter than me, but her heels bring her closer to my height. She’s slim and lean, whereas I’m tall for a woman and more muscular.
She’s wearing bright pink high-waisted trousers with a light pink blouse. The large bow at the collar is whimsical and fun, while the brightness of the hot pink pants give her Barbie vibes. She’s a mix of girlie and girl boss. She’s everything Ethan wanted me to be, and that makes me immediately wary of her.
I lick my lips and force my eyes to hold hers. I expect a look of disgust on her face, but instead I’m met with a look of open desire. I blink, assuming I read her wrong and bring my gaze over to Sadie.
“I knew you two would look wonderful together.” Sadie claps and picks up her camera.
I study our outfits. We’re so different. She’s girl boss Barbie and I’m goth emo discount knock-off doll. I have no idea what Sadie is talking about.
“Let’s take a few test shots so you can see what I see, ‘k?” Sadie suggests. “I think you’re going to love them.”
Sadie has us sit on one of the benches in the pavilion. She talks to us about angles, has us move our bodies slightly, then again. She takes her time setting us up, and I think part of it is to get us used to being near each other.
I sit stiffly for the first few photos, but eventually I start to relax. Over time, our bodies get closer, my smile isn’t as forced.
“Tell me about yourself,” Valerie says while Sadie fiddles with the camera settings.
My shoulders tense at her words. “What do you want to know?”
She rolls her lips and all of my attention is drawn to the corner of her mouth, at one specific crease in her bottom lip. How it pulls as she moves her mouth, how it changes as she speaks.
“Are you from here?”
I shake my head. “No. I just moved here actually. Well, in the fall. I’m from Toronto.”
Her eyes light up. “Really? What made you come all the way out here?”
“Hmm,” I hum, my eyes darting around, taking in the gardens. I haven’t quite figured out how to answer this question when people ask. “I needed a change. I needed a place I could find myself.”
