Kathryn rolled her eyes.
“Babe,breathinggives you anxiety.”
CHAPTER 02
The interest form for Sadie’s Snapshot’s application had too many questions. I knew every answer because they were questions about me, but everyone made me feel like I was sitting across from the blonde on the flyer, in the darkness of my living room, answering these questions about my life like an interrogation.
Kathryn was right. If not soon, then when would I get over the grasp Parker had on my life?
The picture of Parker on the wall taunted me as I pondered another question that felt too deep to be answered in a small box. His goofy smile and dark green eyes were carbon copies of the features left behind on our son.
He wouldn’t smile if he knew I was signing up to be photographed with a stranger. Parker was weird about people in town. He left our home with a chip on his shoulder and returned with something negative to say about at least one person he ran into, usually distressing him enough to funnel back into something that roughed him up in high school.
Parker wasn’t spontaneous. He liked order and preferred to know change, both things I enjoyed, but to a different capacity. We were horrendously compatible for all the wrong reasons.
And now he was dead. I’d finished crying, his things in our room were packed up in the attic, and the truck that sat in the driveway for a whole three years finally sold.
Being spontaneous didn’t sound so bad. At least, not after another drink or two.
My head fell back against the cushions as I heard movement above me. Probably from Kendall’s bedroom. He returned home not long ago from the movies, said goodnight, and rushed off to join his friends on their shared Minecraft realm.
“What am I hoping to get out of this experience?” I whispered the question from the form at the ceiling. Not for Kendall, nor Parker because I doubt he made it anywhere close to heaven, but . . . for some mythical power that could give me . . .
Hovering a single finger over the keys of my laptop, I slowly stabbed a single word into my keys.
Strength.
CHAPTER 03
I received an email from Sadie’s Snapshots the following morning during carpool. At first, I ignored the email as it came through, taking the time to tease Kendall about his new friends before picking up two of his teammates for morning practice.
It was a bit hard for me to believe a bunch of middle schoolers functioned well through the day arriving an hour earlier to school than normal twice a week, but Kendall had no problem being out the door by six to pick up his friends. Until then, I’d keep my mouth shut and support his colorguard journey the best I knew how.
“I’ll pick you up at the Rouses’ after school, okay?” I pointed down the street away from the carpool lane.
Kendall yanked his flagpole out from between the side of the door and the seats. The frigid fall winds burned his pale cheeks red as he leaned into the passenger seat to grab his book bag.
“I know. I know.” He shuffled the straps over his shoulders. “Don’t be too early.”
“I want to go home too, bub.” I chuckled. “I’ll see youatthree-thirty, alright?”
He huffed, but made no sly comment, bobbing his head.
“Three-thirty.”
“Thank you.” I waved to his friends as they hovered nearby. “Have a good day!”
Kendall forcefully shut the car door. If the cold hadn’t burned the tips of his ears pink, I would have thought he was rushing into the school to hide from my embarrassment.
I pulled from the mostly vacant carpool lane and glanced at my phone in the cupholder. A message from Hayley, checking in on Kendall’s birthday plans, lit up my device.
The email from Sadie sat under the two messages from my sister-in-law. TheHey, Eloise!barely visible in the smaller print previewing the message.
I tighten my grip on the steering wheel as I pulled up to the intersection. The light sat on red as the Lake Charles morning traffic flooded by, far too long for my liking.
The phone buzzed again.
Kathryn’s contact popped up. Hayley must have messaged in the group chat. It wasn’t enough to push the notification from Sadie down far enough. SADIE’S SNAPSHOT sat in bold letters, staring up at me.
