God, I was being silly.
“Just walk out there.” I whispered to myself, staring at the opening of the pop-up station.
I stepped toward the door, then shuffled backwards. Who the fuck had I become thinking I could handle a boudoir shoot with an absolute stranger?
The mirror behind me captured the panic in my dark eyes as I turned around. It oozed from deep inside me, burning behind my eyes.
“Eloise?” Sadie called from the other side of the curtain. “Do you need any help?”
Kathryn helped me pick out my outfit over the past weekend. It was her job, apparently, to ensure I picked something that carried my ‘hot ass rack’into the face of whoever I was meeting.
I regretted ever taking her advice.
The maroon two piece made the color that rose into my cheeks an accessory. It complimented the straying freckles around my pale skin, butsimultaneously created a stamp out of the stretch marks that painted my stomach in a squiggled half-moon, and covered most of my upper thighs.
Kathryn nailed her personal goal. My tits were pushed up high and felt like I’d fall over if I leaned too forward. They cradled in the lace with only a thin pad separating my hardened nipples from the cold air.
“Eloise?”
“I-I’m fine. I’m done!” I shook myself out of my thoughts.
It’s a quick photoshoot. An hour with a stranger in my underwear was less than I had done fooling around in college at lesbian bars and frat parties. I could tap into that old forgotten side of me enough to make it through.
“Hey, if you’re uncomfortable, it’s okay to back out.” Sadie gently spoke after a few minutes.
“I want to do it!” I called over my shoulder. “I’ll be right out.”
Ugh. Bless her and all she put up with me.
Between the five hundred questions I needed her to answer, Sadie had been a complete doll through the entire process. I couldn’t put her through all my anxious spiraling just to leave her high and dry.
I pulled my long hair over my shoulder.
With a deep breath, I stepped out from the changing tent.
CHAPTER 05
The last time I noticed someone—reallynoticed someone—I was in college. A nineteen-year-old sophomore that hated her ex-boyfriend and had no idea I’d take his ass back, have a child with him, and watch him leave us with nothing. Before I had to worry about being left behind, there was a girl on a dance floor with kind eyes and soft hips.
The swoon in my stomach when she smiled at me had been stronger than anything I’d experienced before. I blamed the alcohol. We never saw each other again after that, and I was a firm believer that if someone was meant to be in my life that I wouldn’t be able to stop seeing them everywhere I went.
I’d never had to wonder about being noticed. As far back as I remembered, I put in the work.
The way blue eyes were staring down at me as Sadie walked us through the session was hard to ignore.Noahas Sadie introduced them, had blue eyes close to sunlight. So light our typical bipolar Louisiana sky was jealous.
They had a round face; small ears that poked out from their faded sides and a messy blonde top with little streaks of blue nowhere particular.
I picked at my nails behind my back as Noah shifted from smiling—holy fuck—at Sadie, and examining every inch of my face.
They were taller than me. I’d guess by at least half a foot, maybe a full foot. We didn’t have shoes on, but their broad shoulders and longer torso made me feel small.
“What do you think, Eloise?” Sadie’s voice rushed back in as the sounds of more than my labored breathing filled my ears.
“Wonderful.” I managed to push out, turning my body away from Noah’s to regain some composure. “Thank you.”
“Great!” She clapped her hands together. “Let’s get started. Remember to be natural. Don’t force it.”
Sadie smiled between us, then stepped back toward her equipment.
