His eyes are glossy, and his skin is still glowing in the same ecstasy I’m sure is mirrored in my own complexion. The smile is bright, and dazzling. Calling him beautiful would be likesaying the sun was lukewarm. It’d be a disservice. He’s glorious, heavenly, painfully exquisite.
“Grilled cheese it is.” He leaves the room in just his sweatpants, and I snuggle even deeper into the bed, pulling the duvet up and tight around my jaw.
I let out a completely satisfied sigh, “I am so, so fucked.”
I wasn’t aware that I had fallen asleep until the click of a door stirs me awake. I sit up just enough to peek over the silky duvet, to find a shirtless Dean walking towards me with a grilled cheese, a glass of ice water and a bottle of acetaminophen.
“Did I wake you?” He asks, worried about his features.
“Yes, but I’m happy you did.” I sit up straight and accept two pills from him and take them down with the cold water. A relief I didn’t know I needed so badly. I gulp down the whole glass and from when I empty the glass, and to my pleasant surprise, Dean pulls a bottle of water from his pocket. He cracks open the lid and pours half of it into my glass of ice, and I mumble a ‘thank you’.
“Thank you for this.” I say, accepting the plate holding the heaven of melty cheesy goodness.
He shrugs and climbs on the bed between my legs. As if changing his mind, he takes the plate from me and pulls a part of the sandwich apart. When I reach for the piece, he shakes his head and signals for me to open my mouth. Although I’m dense, I finally realize he is wanting to feed me. I blush but accept it anyway. I’ve never been taken care of, not like this. And this personality coming from him was totally unexpected. He’s so broody and stoic, I didn’t expect any tenderness.
“How do you feel?” He asks as I swallow my first bite.
I nod with a soft smile, and I unconsciously chew on my bottom lip, “I’m okay.”
“You’re not sore or anything?”
Laughing quietly, I add, “I didn’t say that. I said I was okay.”
He nods contemplatively and places another bite in my mouth. This may be dramatic, but this is simply the greatest grilled cheese on the planet. It’s gooey and warm, and even spicy which is pleasant. “I’m sorry if I hurt you.” His voice is quieter and softer than I’ve ever heard it before.
“I liked it, well, loved it actually. You could’ve been even more rough if you wanted.” I wink and open my mouth for another bite, enjoying the doting while he’s willing to give it.
“Noted.” He snorts and places another piece on my tongue.
After swallowing, I choose to ask him something that’s currently sitting heavy on my mind, “Will you treat me like this from now on, or will you go back to hating my existence?”
Sighing he takes a moment to answer, but finally says, “I never hated you. I never could, no matter how hard I tried. I want you. All of you. I am here because I have only ever wanted you. You are infuriating and hard headed, and loud and vulgar and damaged. You speak your mind, despite the fact that you are in serious need of a filter. But I want all of it, every last drop of the insanity that is wrapped up in this pretty little package.”
I just gaped at him. There are no words that are deserving enough to respond to what he has just confessed to me.
Seeing that I’m now speechless, which seems to only happen in his presence, he saves me from trying to speak, by offering me the final bite of the grilled cheese. “But I will only be tender with you behind closed doors. Nobody else deserves to see me like this. Nobody but you.”
34
Elastic Limit
Zoe
It was clear after we had started the movie last night, we were all much more tired than we thought. Brandon was lightly snoring immediately after the opening; Teddy fell asleep with his head in my lap while I toyed with his long hair. Dean and I stayed awake for a bit longer, but somewhere around the halfway mark I dozed off against his shoulder.
I jump awake with a start, worried that I may not be up in time formandatory five AMbreakfast with Max. I take in my surroundings, and I see that I’m back in my room, and it's still dark outside with no sign of the early morning sun. It’s not until I try to move that I realize I’m not alone in my bed, not alone at all.
To my left is Dean, barely squeezed into the crowded bed and a strong arm locked around my waist. To my right is Brandon, also slightly hanging off the bed but his hand is lying flat against my stomach. I shift my legs, and I can make out a Teddy clutching to both of my legs like a lifeline.
I let out a contempt sigh as I carefully slid myself up, so my back was against the headboard. I was careful and slow enough not to stir them awake.
My eyes adjust to the dark a bit better, and the small night light on the opposite wall gives me an advantage to actually take in my surroundings. The men have really made me feel comfortable in this room, especially after they went out of their way to decorate it to my liking. Just hints of my personality flaked around the room to make it really feel like mine. However, now I don’t think it’d be a horrible idea to get a bigger bed.
I didn’t realize how close I’ve gotten to these men, even the insufferable Max. I’m scared. I’ve never gotten close to anyone, ever. Growing up in a basement alone with your evil-scientist dad and his invisible assistant until you’re in your late teens does that. Even when I got out, I didn’t try to find friends, of course the occasional one-night-stand, but I never really let anyone stick around. And I sure as hell never made it an effort to stick around.
I’ve been out of the manor plenty of times now, I know their routines, I know just about every single crack and crevice of this house. I could have left a long time ago. But I’ve chosen to stick around, and I think that scares me the most. I have ignored every natural instinct to flee, every instinct to run and hide.
I don’t deserve their kindness; I don’t deserve any of this. Max said it when I first met him-- I stole from them. I was literally molded into a monster, a weapon. Yet, here they are holding me in my bed as some sort of shield made of flesh and will. I am not good enough for them. Maybe I should leave, to make their lives easier. I haven’t been much of a help after Max hired me, I’ve only brought more problems.
