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And I was: it was a picture of me.
CHAPTER 28
CEDRIC
“Dude…what the fuck?” Caleb said as he entered my condo.
I ran my fingers through my dirty mop of overgrown hair. “Nice to see you, too.”
“What’s with the beard…and when did you start smoking again? This place reeks.” Caleb reached for my face and suddenly smacked my cheek.
I scratched my head and ignored him, groggily walking into the kitchen, as Caleb followed me.
“Do you mind telling me what the fuck is going on with you? Caleb asked as he poured a cup of cold coffee. “Mom says you have dropped off the face of the Earth and that it has something to do with Allison or some other woman or both, but she couldn’t tell me shit.”
“Bro, that coffee is from yesterday,” I said as I took the cup from him and looked around for some filters to make a new pot.
Where the fuck did I put the filters?
“Cedric…seriously, what is going on?” Caleb crossed his arms leaning up against the kitchen counter.
Filters…Filters…Bingo!
“Cedric…put the fucking filters down.”
I looked down at the ground.
“Caleb…I…I’m just fucked up. My life is a fucking mess, so I took my three weeks vacation.”
Caleb walked toward me as he spoke. “You call this a vacation…sitting in your apartment, looking like a fucking Chia pet that smells like an ashtray?”
I laughed…for the first time in weeks.
“Fuckhead…it’s my house…what do you want me to do?”
“Cedric…seriously…I had no idea. No news is usually good news with you. Why didn’t you call me? When was the last time you even spoke to anyone?”
“Mom called me yesterday. She, uh, told me about Denise. I am really sorry, man. I don’t want to bother you with my problems.”
During that call, my mother told me that Denise had been pregnant, but had a miscarriage a few days ago at seven weeks. It was the one thing that made me feel sad for anyone but myself in nearly three months. I felt like an asshole for being so out of touch with my family.
Caleb paused and stared at me. I knew he must be devastated. They had tried to have a baby for so long.
He shook his head. “It’s okay, man. We’ll try again. We won’t give up. She’s taking it hard, but we’ll be okay.”
I sat down. “Caleb…fuck…I’ve been so wrapped up in this shit…I should have called you. God, I am sorry.”
“It’s okay…you clearly aren’t in your right mind.” Caleb looked at the ceiling, and then changed the subject. “So, are there any new developments? To what do we owe this shit show?”
Caleb knew about my last encounter with Allison, the night we broke up at Mom’s house, because I called him after it happened.
That was nearly three months ago.
I had chickened out about telling my mother anything at all because I wasn’t ready, not to mention Allison was still in the house when I left.
I became more and more depressed as the weeks passed. I had disappeared from my own life and chose not to face anything or anyone at all. After a couple of months of attempting to throw myself into work, I was nearing a nervous breakdown and took the time off—all three weeks of my vacation. The agency wasn’t happy, but they couldn’t stop me because I had the vacation time.
Each day has been spent in my condo, listening to music, smoking, drinking and watching suck-ass television.
