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Happy Belated Birthday to Me.
Since last week, I haven’t told anyone about it, not even my boyfriend, even though I plan to tell him when I am ready. It just all hasn’t set in yet.
My parents have given me space over the past week and agreed that I didn’t have to talk about it again or do anything about it, until I was ready.
Tonight…I just want to forget everything and I know just how I am going to do that: I am going to lose my virginity.
Even though I am a freshman at Northwestern, I still live at home, in a nice brick house in Naperville, a suburb of Chicago. It’s a commutable distance to school and more affordable than living at Northwestern. Mostly, my parents didn’t want me living in the dorms, for fear I would go buck wild. I still go to campus parties and sleep over friend’s dorm rooms, but my parents want to maintain some control over me, so they make me live at home.
My boyfriend lives on campus and sometimes I let him into my bedroom window at night after my parents have gone to sleep. Since my room is a converted garage and separate from the rest of the house, they can’t hear anything when he comes over. Tonight’s one of those nights and I am waiting for him to arrive because I want to drown my sorrows in him.
There is one window at the front of my bedroom. Since knocking would wake up my parents, he flashes a light in the window when he gets here. Then, I open it and quietly sneak him in. That was our routine.
When I finally saw the light tonight, I eagerly ran to the window, opening it.
“You’re late, Cedric.”
“I know, baby…sorry, the guys wanted to get beers after class and then we ended up shooting pool,” he said before kissing me hard.
Every time he kissed me, I lost my mind.
My boyfriend is movie star hot with shaggy brown hair, light blue eyes and a sculpted athletic body. He was a popular senior and every girl’s dream and I was only a freshman.
We met at a campus party and I noticed all these sorority girls throwing themselves at him. Who could blame them? Then, he noticed me from across the room, singled me out and we starting talking as if all those other girls evaporated into thin air. There was no one else in the room but us at that point. He made fun of my Chicago accent and I made fun of the way he didn’t pronounce some of his r’s because he’s from Boston. He says things like “Wicked Pisser”, except he’d say it like “Wicked Pissa.” He’s a little rough around the edges which, turns me on. I had never been with a bad boy before. He smokes, drinks, swears, starts fights and seems to adore me. I, on the other hand, am a shy Daddy’s girl, who says Gosh instead of God and well, who’s never had sex. We were opposites…but have been inseparable ever since that first night a few months ago.
Cedric’s been with a lot of girls before me, but he’s been patient. He’s used to girls throwing themselves at him and I think the fact that I didn’t give it up so easily is a bit of a challenge for him. He’s experienced but knows I am still a virgin and hasn’t pressured me to do anything I’m not comfortable with. We’d basically done everything—except that—but tonight that’s going to change.
He just doesn’t know it yet.
Cedric took his shoes off and plopped down on my bed. I could smell cigarettes and beer on him, mixed with his cologne and the combination of all those smells actually turned me on even more.
“What’s with the look?” he said smirking.
“Nothing…I was just thinking about how sexy my man is.” I crawled on top of him and pulled his face toward mine, straddling him as we kissed.
Cedric pulled away and caressed my long dark hair, examining me. “You look different tonight, baby.”
I had made myself up more than usual. I lifted my shirt and exposed a new black lace bra I had bought today from Victoria’s Secret at the mall and said, “I feel different, Cedric.”
His pupils dilated as he took in the sight of the lingerie and peeked into my pants to see I had matching lace underwear.
“What does that mean?” he grinned.
“It means…I want you, Cedric.”
Cedric caressed my face and his eyes widened. “You want me…to...what?”
“Cedric…I want…you.”
“But you have me.” He smiled.
“I know. But …I want…you know…everything.”
He started deeply into my eyes and I felt myself get moist with anticipation.
“Whoa…are you saying what I think you are saying?”
I nodded, still sitting on top of him and could feel his hard-on pressing into me through his jeans. “Yes, Cedric, I am.”
