“Yeah,” I say quickly, before he can mistake my shock for hesitation. “Yes. I mean, I’m on PrEP, so we can do it without condoms. Or not. Whatever you want is fine.”
I’m talking too fast. I know I’m talking too fast, but I can’t seem to stop, because suddenly I’m terrified he’ll change his mind.
“I don’t have lube either,” Connor says, a trace of regret in his voice.
“Oh. Okay.” My face burns. “Let’s do that thing, then. The rubbing thing.”
Connor watches me for a moment longer, like he’s trying to make sure I’m really okay with it, then guides me onto my stomach.
“Is this okay?” he asks, his voice close now.
“Yeah,” I murmur.
The mattress shifts under his weight. I hear fabric rustle, and then his hands are on my hips, big and warm. His touch is careful at first, like he’s still making sure I want this, and then one of his fingers slides between my cheeks, brushing over me.
I shiver, my breath catching.
Connor takes his boxers off completely and settles closer, his knees pressing against the outside of my thighs. I can feel the heat of him behind me, the weight of his body as he leans over me.
Then his cock slides along the crease of my ass.
Not pushing inside. Just pressing against me, hot and slick.
My back arches before I can stop it, my hips pushing back toward the pressure.
It’s been so long since anyone touched me like this.
“Is this okay?” Connor asks again.
“Yes,” I say, pushing back to make it clear. “God, yes.”
Connor makes a rough sound behind me. The mattress shifts as he leans back, and a second later his shirt drops to the floor beside the bed.
Then his hands return to my hips, and his cock drags along sensitive skin. The friction is perfect—not enough, then too much, then suddenly just right as he finds a rhythm. My cock, which had softened after I came, starts to fill again as pleasure builds low in my spine.
“Fuck,” Connor mutters behind me, one hand sliding up to press between my shoulder blades, keeping me down as his hips roll against me.
The pressure is maddening—Connor’s cock sliding along my crack, the head catching against my entrance but never pushing in. Each time it happens, my body tenses with anticipation, even though I know nothing is going to happen tonight.
It’s torture.
It’s perfect.
“Connor,” I gasp when the head of his cock bumps against me again, sending a jolt of pleasure up my spine. “Fuck me. Please.”
He lets out a rough little laugh, like the words almost undo him.
“It won’t feel good without lube,” he says.
He’s right.
I know he’s right.
But I’m suddenly terrified there might not be another time.
His cock catches against my entrance again, on purpose this time, and I bite my lip to keep from making too much noise. We’re not alone in this house. Rick and Cassidy are in the room next to ours, and they must be able to hear us, but I can’t stay quiet even if I want to.
Connor pulls back suddenly. I turn my head, trying to see what’s happening, and catch him spitting into his palm.
