It may have worked a little too well.
“What are we going to do?” I ask, as the boat rocks harshly again.
“I don’t fucking know.”
I pause, confused. What does he mean he doesn’t know?
“What do you mean?” I say, shaking my head in confusion.
“What he means,” Kellen growls over the yelling surrounding us, “is that they were having trouble getting the radio to work and have to evacuate, we have no idea if they managed to call for help. Not to mention the safety beacon was in the kitchen, so nobody can fucking get it and we couldn’t find any more. The captain ordered everyone off.”
My stomach turns in a way that has me gripping the side of the boat and trying to stop myself from vomiting.
“There would have been more than one safety feature, and the captain would have a phone,” I say, my voice shaky.
“Apparently not. Someone didn’t fuckin’ think this boat would ever go down, because we couldn’t find any more. The captain has a phone, but if you recall, there is no fucking service.”
Oh god.
Did my father do this on purpose? Ensure there wasn’t enough safety equipment? Surely not, surely he would want us back alive over dead.
Or was he actually planning something even worse than we thought?
My stomach twists and my eyes burn with unshed tears.
“What are you saying?” Tatiana whisper-hisses.
“That we have only one way to call for help, and there is no guarantee,” Ace growls. “That’s what. Can only hope the damaged beacon in the kitchen goes off automatically, or the captain manages to get through somehow.”
Silence fills the lifeboat, before Rachel starts to cry and wail, followed by Iris.
I stare out at the open sea, eyes wide, wondering what the hell we have done.
The yacht recedes, the fire softening as we cut away from it.
It doesn’t look like anyone is still on there, and I can only hope he managed to get that radio call through or we just put all our lives at risk.
We try to keep the lifeboats together, but the sea pulls us in different directions so Ace ties ours with a rope, doing the best he can to keep us near them. After that, we all fall silent, and I am sick with regret. Aggie let go of my hand a while ago, and is just staring into nothingness, her face blank. Tatiana sobs quietly.
Rachel turns on me with fresh rage. “What the hell sort of piece of crap boat did your father send us out on? He did this on purpose. Was this the plan all along? This is all your fault. If we die out here, it is because of you and your pathetic father.”
I don’t even fight her, maybe she’s right. Maybe this is my father’s doing. Maybe the safety equipment was never even there. Why didn’t we check that first? We rushed a decision and now it might cost us our lives, and everyone else’s.
I just stare, feeling numb.
We drift, all of us silent, our hearts beating against our ribs with a violence we can’t articulate. The luxury yacht casts a molten light over the night, both beautiful and apocalyptic. I can’t feel anything but the cold, wet air and the warmth of Aggie’s shoulder pressed to mine. Every now and then, the boats slam together, causing us to jerk, everyone's head snapping up before slowly lowering again until the next time.
I look at Ace, on the other boat, staring into nothing. His eyes flicker, catching mine. He looks concerned, and that worries me the most because that means things are far worse than we had anticipated. We didn’t mean for anyone to get hurt, but the longer we drift, the worse I feel. Why would my father do this? He might be a lot of things, but I still would have thought he loved me.
“You good?” Ace asks, maybe he mouths it, I don’t know.
I nod.
If he knows what we did, will he ever forgive us?
That is, of course, if we make it out alive.
WE LOST THEM.
