She turned at my voice. “Seph? What the hell are you doing here?” she asked, her voice flat.
“I came to see you.”
“Why?”
“To check on you. I was worried.” I moved closer, enough to see the multiple tubes hooked into her skin.
She looked down. “Magic suppressors. They don’t want me burning the place down I guess.”
“I know it wasn’t you, Jess.” I said finally.
Her eyes snapped to me. “You don’t. You can’t. And even if you did, it wouldn’t matter. It’s not like I haven’t fantasised about that very thing over and over again before.”
“But it wasn’t you. You shouldn’t be blamed for this.”
Jess just laughed. “No one cares about people like me, Seph. Do you know why I’m here? In this godforsaken institute?”
“You don’t have to tell me – “
“No. You’re here. You should know. I killed my little sister.”
I sank into a chair, her words hitting harder than I expected. “Oh, Jess.”
“It was an accident. She was never supposed to be there. I had just wanted to hurt him… “
“Him?”
“My uncle. Jack. He took us in when my parents died. He’s a prominent member of the council you know. They called him a saint.”
“Jess – “
“No one wanted to hear me tell them about those nights in the dark. When he would sneak into my room. When he would – “ She stopped. “No one would believe me when I said I didn’t like it. That I hated him. That he was a sick, disgusting pervert. He was too good at pretending.”
I just sat there, listening.
“I just wanted it to stop, you know? I wanted him to leave me alone. But then he would look at Kyra. She was only 7 years old, Seph. And I couldn’t – I wouldn’t – “
“Jess you don’t have to go on.”
“I want to. I want to get this out. I lit the fire while he was napping. I thought Kyra was at school. I thought she was safe. But she got out early.”
Jess started sobbing.
“I tried to get her out but it was too late. I killed her. And the worst part? Jack got away.”
I reached out for her with my gloved hands. I rested my hand on her back, over her blanket.
“I had a sister too,” I said finally. “Her name was Sable. And she was everything to me. My best friend, my confidant. Before I came here, she came to see me. She wanted to talk to me. She had got involved with some people and she wanted me to meet them.” I swallowed. “I went with her, but something went wrong. I tried to protect her. I thought I could.”
Jess turned to look at me, waiting. Tears streaked her face.
“She died in front of me. Bleeding out, her blood was everywhere. On my clothes, my face. My hands,” I said finally, staring down at them, as if they were still tainted. As if I could still see it.
“Is that why you are here?” Jess asked finally, wiping her face.
“Among other reasons. I don’t tell you that to pity you. I just – I want you to know I understand. I know what it’s like to lovesomeone so much, you would do anything for them. I know what it’s like to fail.”
Jess was silent. She looked thoughtful.