I look at the girl who looks back at me in the mirror, seeing how pathetic I am, wondering how anyone ever wanted anything to do with me.
Dimitri and Julian deserve better, more than I can ever be.
My hair is dripping wet, my eyes red and puffy from crying as I attempt to scrub the purple dye from my hair.
Julian said that I had to use cold water or it would wash out, but this water is damn near scalding hot, and while the runoff is slightly purple, it doesn’t look like it’s doing much to fade.
“Please…” I choke on a sob as I pump more soap into my hand and continue to scrub, even knowing it’s pointless.
My head throbs with every sob and hiccup; the headache I’ve had the last few days is growing into something that’s nearly blinding, but I push through. I’ve been through worse, and if I don’t get this color out of my hair, I guarantee I’ll have that again. Hell, even if I fix it, I might be in for worse.
“Eternity?” The sound of his voice bouncing around the room makes me gasp as I spin around to find him standing near the door, a deep frown on his beautiful lips.
I didn’t even hear him come in.
The bathroom had been thankfully empty when I came in, probably due to the early hour and the fact that it's the weekend. I don't even remember how I got here or know how long it's been, let alone how he found me.
I expect to feel the urge to run the way I had earlier, but it never comes, at least not the way I expected. Instead, I feel the urge to run toward him, even with all that’s wrong. I’ve missed Felix.
I sniffle, my breathing stuttering and weak as I wipe my face with my arms, trying to make myself look less pathetic.
Such an impossible task right now.
He holds my gaze, and I don’t see even a hint of judgment. He opens his arms, and I don’t even fight the urge to go to him. Even soapy, crying, and whimpering, I run into his arms hard enough that it takes the little bit of air I have before I suck in a deep breath and start crying all over again.
“What’s wrong?” I feel the deep rumble of his voice against my face as I hide away in his chest; it’s oddly soothing.
“I… She—she’s…” I try to tell him, but I can’t seem to form a coherent thought, let alone a sentence.
“Shhhh.” He runs a hand through my hair, and I feel the soft, well-worn leather of his gloves on my neck as he holds me tight to his chest.
It feels like he’s the only thing holding me together right now.
He gathers me up in his arms, and I don’t fight him. I’m not sure I could do anything against him even if I tried, so I’m glad I don’t have to. I don’t know how to explain it, but IknowFelix wouldn’t hurt me; I can feel it in my bones, despite what Titus might think.
“Do you have your key?” he asks, pulling me from my thoughts and making me pull back to look up at him.
I don’t know if I dozed off or if he’s just quick, but we’re back at the dorm now.
“What time is it?” I rush to ask, worried about who might see me like this if he were to open that door right now.
He holds me tighter, and I breathe in his warm, dark chocolate scent; it calms me as he offers me a soft smile.
“It’s not even noon yet. Everyone’s still out for now.”
I’m not sure how he knew what my concern was; maybe I’m just that obvious, but I let out a sigh of relief knowing they won’t see me like this.
I reach for my bag only to find it isn’t on my back.
“I have it,” Felix says again, saving me from my panic, and I chuckle at how fucking pathetic I am right now. It's not funny, but if I don’t laugh, I’ll cry, and I’ve done more than enough of that.
“It’s in the left-side pocket.” He pulls the key out and lets us in, kicking it closed behind him without missing a beat as I finally get a hold of myself.
“I can walk.” I try to wiggle free, but he only holds me tighter, grumbling at me as he continues into the dorm, his eyes bouncing around the space as if looking for something specific.
Maybe he’s making sure the guys really aren’t here? Or maybe his dorm doesn’t look like this?
“Which way?”
