He exhales hard. "Did I picture her having my kid? A little piece of the two of us—an actual human? I fuckingcried."
I roll my eyes. “People have babies all the time. It’s the circle of life and all that shit.”
He looks out the window and shrugs. "But I wonder if they appreciate what that means sometimes, you know? You and I… we've seen a lot. We've lost a lot."
We don’t speak for long minutes, just looking ahead. I’ve buried my sister and brother. He’s buried his parents.
We talk about old times. He tells me about the latest fucking indie album he downloaded that Ember got him into, and I give him shit about it.
Who the fuck listens to that shit?
Then he puts it on, and I have to admit—damn, it's good.
He tells me about Semyon and how funny it is to see his cold, ice-hearted brother actually fall in love.
I bitch to him about my parents, about how I changed the locks and haven’t told them yet.
I want them to just show up and try the lock.
Feels like poetic justice.
"Tell me about her," he says quietly. "I know why you got her. How do you feel now? She still got you under her spell?"
I shake my head. "She is my little witch," I say affectionately, looking out the window.
But I'm not really joking.
I mean it.
Shehascast her spell on me.
He smiles at me and nods. "Brother, I understand."
And I know he does.
I saw the way he talked about his wife last night.
This is the man who tracked down the bastard who hurt his wife, beat the shit out of him, duct-taped him to a tree, and made him watch while he fucked his wife before he killed him.
Yeah. He knows.
He shakes his head and smiles, but it’s a little self-deprecating. "Like, you're just walking around, you know? Living life. Same shit. And then she just—" His voice drops. "She just comes into your life and turns everything on its head. And nothing’s the same. Nothing ever goes back to the way it was. And you can’t imagine… you can’t imagine going back to the way things were before her. You can’t imagine life before her. Or after her."
He glances at me.
"That's exactly what it is."
"Good. I got you all sentimental and fired up, just like I wanted. Takes a lot of energy to kick the shit out of somebody. But if you do it for a reason? Totally different. This woman deserves your protection, doesn’t she, brother?"
I swallow hard again.
"She fucking does."
"Tell me what she’s like."
I know he doesn’t really care.
But he cares about me.