“This is a great night for me,” I said, laughing.
Dorian and I took the bottle of wine and our glasses out to the back patio. The sun had long since disappeared on the horizon, leaving behind streaks of pink and orange. His roses, having blushed under the sun all afternoon, filled the air with their sweet scent.
“Nate’s widow, Becca, came by the store today.” He turned his glass in his hands. “She’s getting married. In two weeks.”
“That’s soon,” I said.
“It is. She met him at Christmas.” He paused. “She asked me to give her away.”
“Oh, okay. What did you say?”
“I couldn’t say no.” He looked at the table. “It feels—I don’t know. Strange. Right and wrong at the same time.”
“Like so many things, both can be true.”
He nodded, but he was somewhere else for a moment. I didn’t push. After a moment or so, he said, “I wonder what Nate would think. Seeing his bride walk down the aisle on my arm toward another man? I can’t get my head around how this all works.”
“Everyone always tells me—‘Jon would want you to be happy.’”
“Do you believe that?” Dorian asked.
I closed my eyes for a moment, an image of Jon from when we were young floating before me. He was smiling. His eyes were clear. “Yes, I do believe he would want me to be happy. But it’s not that simple, and we both know that.”
“We do.” He reached over to take my hand. “I want you to be happy. And I want it to be me who makes you that way.”
“I’m hard to love. Prickly. Sarcastic. Too blunt.”
“Totally disagree on all counts. You’re easy to love. Funny as hell. Honest. Straightforward. Really smart. And you make me laugh.”
“You make me laugh.”
“I could make it my full-time job,” Dorian said. “Also, the way you put together the table tonight, like it was a work of art—pretty sexy, Delphine Delacroix.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been described as sexy.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re wrong about that.”
“We can put a pin in it,” I said, smiling back at him.
“And you have the best kid on the planet.”
“That we can agree on.”
He leaned in to kiss me. I kissed him back, remembering how it felt to be fully alive in my body and long for someone again. I’d shut that part of myself off, and I didn’t think it would ever return. And I thought about his mother, choosing the perfect books for Annie and me, with no idea how entwined our lives would someday be with her son’s. Or that her one kind gesture would inspire an entire garden and grant me hours and hours of peace when I so desperately needed them.
Now, finally, softening into the woman I wanted to be? The one I should be?
I waited for the familiar twinge of unease or distrust that would send me running. But nothing came, other than a desire to open myself to him.
And to welcome this new, softer version of myself into the world.
17
DORIAN
Ihad never been a particularly impulsive man. The Navy had trained any recklessness out of me, and running a bookstore in a small town required a different kind of patience. Thus, I could hardly believe I’d suggested an overnight trip for Annie’s game. Regardless, I was like a kid at Christmas. I could not wait.
I’d packed for one night in Cliffside Bay as if preparing for a minor military operation. I had beach towels, sunscreen, a small first-aid kit, directions to the soccer field printed and folded in the glove box, bottled water, blue sports drinks, and a bag of sour gummies I’d noticed Annie liked. I’d also readSoccer for Dummiesfrom cover to cover in preparation.
