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‘Margo, hush.’ Tenderly he wiped the tears from her cheeks. ‘You must stop blaming yourself for what happened.’
She’d been tortured by both guilt and grief for years, and he longed to release her.
‘What happened to Annelise could have happened to any child, any mother. And you were only a child yourself. As for our son...you’ve been so careful during this pregnancy. I’ve seen you. Nothing is your fault.’
She shook her head but he continued.
‘You must let the past go and forgive yourself. You must look to your future—our future—and our son’s future. Because I love you, and I wish I’d told you before. I wish you’d known how much I loved you when you went into surgery. I wish you’d had that to hold on to.’
She blinked up at him, searching his face. ‘Do you mean it, Leo?’ she asked quietly. ‘Do you really mean it?’
‘With all my heart.’
‘I haven’t even said how I feel.’
‘If you don’t love me,’ he answered steadily, ‘it’s all right. I can wait—’
‘But I do love you.’ She cut him off. ‘I was going to tell you tonight, when we had dinner—’
‘Nothing turned out quite as we expected, did it?’ he said, and pressed a kiss to her palm. ‘But now we’ve told each other, and we have our son, and I will do everything in my power to keep you safe and secure and—’
‘I believe you!’ With a trembling laugh she pressed the palm he’d just kissed against his lips. ‘You don’t have to convince me.’
‘I want to spend a lifetime convincing you.’
Tears sparkled on her lashes. ‘And our little boy...?’
‘Why don’t you come and see him?’
* * *
Margo’s heart was beating with thuds so hard they made her feel sick as Leo wheeled her up to the ICU. He parked the wheelchair in front of the glass and Margo stared at the row of plastic cradles, the tubes and the wires, the tiny beings fighting so hard for life.
And then she saw the words ‘Enfant Marakaios’ and everything in her clenched hard. Her son. Hers and Leo’s.
‘Oh, Leo,’ she whispered, and reached for his hand.
They stared silently at the baby they’d made, now waving his fists angrily.
‘He’s got a lot of spirit—or so the doctor says,’ Leo said shakily. ‘He’ll fight hard.’
Margo felt a hot rush of shame that she’d considered, even for a moment, protecting herself against the pain of loving this little boy. Of loving Leo. She’d spent a lifetime apart, atoning for her sins, trying to keep her shattered heart safe. But Leo, with his kindness and understanding and love, had put her back together again. Had made her want to try. To fight, and fight hard—just as their son was.
‘I’m sorry—’ she began, but Leo shook his head.
‘No, don’t be sorry. Just enjoy this moment. Enjoy our family.’
‘Our little man,’ Margo whispered, and then looked up at Leo.
He smiled down at her, his eyes bright with tears. Her family, Margo thought, right here.
There were no certainties—not for anyone. No guarantees of a happily-ever-after, no promises that life would flow smoothly. Life was a rough river, full of choppy currents, and the only thing she could do was grab on to those she loved and hold on. Hold on for ever.
And, clinging to Leo’s hand, that was just what she was going to do.
EPILOGUE
‘WHERE ARE WE GOING?’ Margo asked as they stepped out onto the pavement in front of her apartment.
It was three months since their son had been born, and he was coming home from the hospital tomorrow. To celebrate, Leo was taking her out to dinner.
It had been a long, harrowing three months.
Annas—the name meant ‘a gift given by God’—had had several lung infections that had terrified both Leo and Margo at the time, and twice it had been touch and go. Margo had felt more fear then than she ever had before, and yet with Leo’s support and strength she’d met every challenge head-on, determined to believe in her son, to imbue him with all the strength and love she felt.
And he was healthy now—weighing just over five pounds, and more precious to Leo and Margo than they ever could have known.
Leo hailed a cab, and as the car pulled to the kerb he leaned over the window to give directions. He’d been making a big secret of their destination, which made Margo smile.
When the cab pulled up to the Eiffel Tower she looked at him in surprise. ‘Sightseeing...?’
‘In a way,’ he answered, and drew her by the hand from the cab to the base of the tower, where a man stood by the elevator that surged up its centre, waiting for them.
