“You should go back to bed,” I say, glancing at the clock on the stove. 4:44 a.m.
“No, because you’re starting to spiral and we need to intervene, right, Lila?”
I fold my arms over my chest. “I’m not spiraling.”
Cora waves to the mounds of baked goods. Lila gives me an innocent look after taking a bite of a cinnamon roll.
“I don’t mind the spiraling when it involves these,” she says, lifting the roll.
Cora and I both laugh. “You are so much like your father,” Cora says. She then turns to me and says, “Start talking.”
“About what?”
She scowls at me. “Just word vomit. Anything that comes to mind is free game.”
“Just don’t start with, ‘When I was a kid,’” Lila says. “We don’t have that kind of time.”
Her quips are easing some of the tightness in my chest. “What is there to say? I told myself not to get attached to a guy who was only here for a short time. Then he was all nice and helpful. He was cute and romantic, holding my hand and…stuff.”
It was a bad ending, but I didn’t want to explain my cuddling with him overnight in his apartment.
“What’s the hang-up?” Cora asks.
“He’s a billionaire, Mom,” Lila says, like that’s the biggestnews in the world. “And something about him having a girlfriend.”
She smiles. “I know. We talked about this most of last night. I’m asking why Avery is having a hard time. Explain it again, so we don’t miss a thing.”
“What if,” I begin, pausing to gather my thoughts. “What if I was just a placeholder? Someone to hang out with because I was here. What if that’s all I’ll ever be?” Emotion clogs in my throat and tears threaten to fall. “Gosh, I shouldn’t even be crying over a man. It’s only been a week,” I say with a laugh, trying to tease.
Cora and Lila aren’t laughing, though.
“More like three,” Lila says.
“You’re not a placeholder, Avery,” Cora says.
I raise an eyebrow. “For Curt, that’s all I was. And Max was happy to spend time with me until it was time for him to leave and go marry Veronica or whatever her name is.”
“Your story isn’t over yet. You can’t give up completely. Do you like Max?”
I stick out my bottom lip a bit and dip my head.
“Do you more than like him?”
“Maybe. But what good is that going to do me if he lives in New York?”
Lila blinks a few times. “He’s a billionaire. Maybe he has a fancy jet or something. He could come and pick you up or send it when you have to attend fancy events.
My chest tightens a bit at that thought. “What if he dictates what I wear like Curt?”
“But what if he gives you one of those fancy black credit cards and books you an appointment with a lady who can give you options of what to wear?”
“Where do you come up with this stuff?” Cora asks, shaking her head.
I wave my hands in the air, as if it will help me focus better. “We’re getting way ahead of ourselves. He’s got to go back at some point, and I’m not leaving Penrose.”
“I don’t think Max wants to leave.”
Cora and I turn to her. “What do you mean?” I ask.
