He grinned. Here they were again at the question of his love for her. Obviously, he was going to have to tell her the truth, though disguised, and he said, "Of course I love you. We are friends."
"Friends? But, I thought you said you could no longer consider me a friend when you wished to bed me."
"I did, and for good reason. I asked you to be my woman for your sake and for your reputation within my tribe. I should not mislead you. Desiring a woman and caring for her in friendship is a part of a man's nature in loving a woman. But, let me explain further: if we make love and arenotmarried, in my tribe there is adisgrace which paints a woman in a bad way. And, it could go bad for you."
"And, you? Would you be painted, too?"
"I fear not," he replied. "I would be congratulated on my good judgment and good luck, while you would be shunned, perhaps worse. Further, no good woman would speak to you. This is why I suggested we should marry. I will, however, be happy with being no more than your lover if I decide it is worth teaching you about lovemaking. But, whatever you and I decide, we will be friends anyway."
Because they were sitting so closely together, he felt her sigh, and holding her as he was he could feel her breasts rise and fall with her breathing. Meanwhile, his body answered hers in the age-old manful way.
"But," Czanna said after a while, "it isn't fair to judge a woman and not the man, though I must admit it is much the same in my society."
Perhaps it was because they were sitting so closely together, but he felt her frustration, and he said, "I agree. It is not fair. However, I cannot change the ideas and thoughts of each man and woman in the tribe. It has been this way for hundreds, perhaps thousands of years. And, this, my beautiful friend, is why I asked you to be my woman."
"Then, you didn't propose this to me because you have come to love me?"
He groaned, wishing he were not involved in this conversation with her. But, common courtesy demanded he answer her, and he said, "I desire to make love to you. For me, if I feel this way about a woman, I should propose to make her my woman."
She was quiet for so long he was about to rise to his feet and begin the chores needed for their journey, when she asked, "Have you ever asked another woman to marry you?"
He let out his breath in a gasp, wondering how she had managed to pull him into a conversation so taboo. But, he answered her politely and said, "I have."
"You have? And, did she agree?"
"She did not, though she told me she wished to be my woman."
"But, why did she not marry you if she wanted to?"
Again he paused, while he considered rising up to his feet and walking away. But, then again, it was he who had originally spoken of marriage to her, and he understood the bad effect it might have on her were he to refuse to discuss the matter now at hand with her. And so, he said, "Because I am Lakota, and she is Pikuni."
"I do not understand," Czanna said. "Aren't the Lakota and the Pikuni tribes?"
"They are."
"I still do not understand."
Stands Strong sighed before seeking to enlighten her, and he paused for a moment, realizing there was to be no backing away from having this talk with her, though it was a subject he had not ever discussed with another living being. It was at some length when he said, "The grandparents of the girl I sought to marry were killed by a Lakota warrior. Indeed, her father's own brother was killed in war with the Lakota. Because of this, the father of the girl I sought to marry swore he would never have me as a son-in-law, stating he would kill me first."
"Oh dear," she said. "But, couldn't you both have stolen away?"
"We could have, but instead she chose the peaceful way to bring the matter to a close, and in the end, she chose to marry another. The man she married is a good man, and they are happy together. She is now with child."
"Oh. What is her name?"
"Good Shield Woman."
"And, did you love her?"
He slanted Czanna a smile, one he hoped was lopsided, as though he didn't care about what had happened. But, at length he confessed, "I did."
"And, do you love her still?"
He deliberately refrained from answering her question directly, saying only, "A man never stops loving a woman. He merely moves on."
"Oh," was all she said. Then, she asked, "Are you courting another woman in your tribe now?"
"What means this word 'courting'?"
