"She already first wife. Cannot change what is."
"But, could thou not ask her to let thee go? To throw thee away? And, thou do the same? After all, it be four years, and she has been across the mountains. So close to thee. Why, if she be a slave, could she not have escaped? Anythin' be better than bein' a slave."
"Mountains not easy to cross," he replied. "She would die."
"But, it if were me," Liliann said, "I would be tryin' to find a way."
He sighed. But, he didn't say a word. Instead, he sighed again. At some length, he said, "It not matter. Gave word to her father. Gave vow to her…she be first wife. I have to try…bring back unless her father agrees…'let dogs sleep.'"
"But, thou will ask him?"
First Rider nodded. "I ask."
Liliann looked away from him and, under her breath, mumbled, "Thou made promises to me, too."
But, he heard her and he replied, "You be second wife. I not abandon. Love you with all…heart. Love you more than—"
"Thou be knowin' I cannot be your second wife when thou would be livin' with thy first wife, even if thou keeps her in a different lodge. Me own beliefs forbid it."
He sighed once more before he said, "I know."
"Dear Lord, what is to become of us? If thou bring her back and she becomes thy wife, what will thou do about me? Will thou be throwin' me away, then?"
"Never!"
"I'd be havin' to leave."
"Saa, you…stay here with the people," he said. "You belong here. I take care…of you, hunt for you, make sure…life easy for you. Not as wife, so you not disobey your God. I take care…of you as…my medicine woman."
Liliann heaved in a deep sigh. She looked toward the tepee's entrance, now pinned into place. At length, she said, "Thou must know I cannot be doin' as thou suggest. I would be seein' thee everyday with her. Thou must know how hard 'twould be on me own self."
He didn't say a word, and a long silence followed.
After a while, she asked, "I suppose we'll be leavin' soon, then?"
"We?"
"Until we be knowin' the truth, I am still thy wife. Besides, I am still havin' the same dream. So, until thou makes her a wife in fact, I be goin' where thou goes."
"Dream…you still have?"
"I do. Since I be here in camp, it seems to be comin' more frequently than before."
"Why you not tell me?" he asked.
She shrugged. "So happy have I been with thee, I could not speak of it." When he said not a single word, she asked again, "And so, when exactly does thou think we should be leavin'?"
"Saa,no. You not go. I go across mountains alone. It…my quest. You…not come. Hard journey. The Snakes, the River People, the Kootenai tribes live in mountains…all enemies…mountain trails hard…dangerous. You stay here."
Liliann merely shook her head, then said, "Until the moment when Tsistsaki runs into thine arms, I still be married to thee. I took me own vows, too. I be keepin' them now, and I'll be goin' with thee across the mountains."
So saying, she turned her back on him and lay down, her face toward the tepee liner, the pleasant scent of the buffalo skin liner and the brilliant colors and shapes painted on it seeming to mock her. When First Rider came to lie down beside her and take her into his arms, she still didn't turn in toward him. She couldn't. After all, she was hurting; she was losing this man to Tsistsaki, a woman who Liliann was beginning to think didn't deserve him.
Oh, she understood First Rider's dedication to honor his pledge to Tsistsaki, as well as to Tsistsaki 's father. But, even with this understanding, the hurt was overpowering, and she felt as though she were an insignificant detail against the impact of what First Rider thought was right. But, it wasn't right; itcouldn't be right, if only because it would cause her marriage to First Rider to disintegrate, as though it had never been.
She cried. Of course, she cried. She couldn't remember a time when she had been so happy as she had been during these first few months of marriage with First Rider. And, now she was losing him. And, the worst part of it was this: she understood why.
But, she didn't really understand it at all, if truth be told. There was more to this, but what? Was it fate?
