Which is pathetic. I’ve known them for a week. And somehow, my stupid brain has decided that three gorgeous men and all their broody baggage are worth occupying every spare thought I have. I hate it. Hate that my mind wanders when I’m trying to work. Hate that I find myself wondering what it would be like to let go, just once. To stop carrying the weight of everything and give in to my senses.
It’s not fair, and completely my fault for falling into whatever trap my hormones have decided to lay for me.
Exhaustion is a dangerous thing. It strips away common sense and leaves you alone with nothing but your thoughts. And lately, my thoughts have been traitorous.
I find myself imagining what Sasha’s hands would feel like roaming across my flesh as he nipped at my neck. Holden on his knees, my clit between his teeth. And Dominic…the broody equipment manager is hot as fucking hell. The quiet observer. The one always lingering just out of sight with those dimples and that easy smile that makes me feel like I’m in on some joke I haven’t heard yet. I’ve imagined him too. Standing to my right, sucking my nipple into his mouth, eliciting a soul deep moan I can’t keep down, all while his pack devours me like I’m their last fucking meal.
God, I hate myself.
A knock sounds at my door, drawing my attention from my self loathing, and I nearly jump out of my skin. My hand flies to my chest as my eyes dart toward the office door.
My fucking God. I thought I was alone here. I reach over and flick on my desk lamp, not realizing just how dark it’d gotten.
“Come in,” I call out, a little uneasy. The handle turns slowly, and I almost wish it hadn’t.
Holden Woods steps into my office, his broad frame filling the doorway, all that cocky confidence wrapped in a black Cardinals t-shirt and sweats that hang low on his damn hips. The hallwaybehind him is dark, leaving his face cast in shadow. For a second, all I see are those beautiful green eyes, a little darker in the night, and the curve of a smirk that tells me he knows something I don’t. My heart almost stops. Not because it’s Holden, but because it’s after ten at night and I thought I was alone.
“What are you doing here so late?” His shadowed smile widens, the darkness only making him look more dangerous.
“Funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.”
I blink. My pulse is finally slowing now that I know I’m not about to become the topic of news headlines tomorrow morning when they find my body.
“You nearly gave me a fucking heart attack.”
“Sorry…Coach.” He says the last word like it’s venom in his mouth, his lips curling around the title as though the very idea of me being in charge leaves a bitter taste behind. The low rumble of his voice sends an unwelcome shiver down my spine, and I hate that my body notices things like that. Especially now. With him standing there in the doorway, half hidden in the fucking dark.
“Right. Can I help you?” I ask, clearing my throat, doing my best to abolish any signs of my unease because his noticing that detail is the last thing I need right now. He hums thoughtfully, stepping into the office and closing the door behind him. I watch as he takes in the office. The laptop on my desk, the game footage paused on the screen. The whiteboard covered in arrows and scribbled notes. The three empty coffee cups littering my desk.
He doesn’t say anything, and neither do I as he comes to sit down in one of the stiff chairs I haven’t gotten around to replacing yet.
Eventually, I clear my throat. “I trust your extra training this afternoon went well?”
That only seems to make his smile widen. “It did.” He shifts in the chair, stretching those long legs out in front of him. “It felt good being able to really…” He drags out they, his tone laced with enough sarcasm to make my eye twitch. “...watch out for the other players around me. Loved beingflattenedby Toby, you know?” My eyes narrow. Toby did the opposite of what I advised him earlier today. My goal had been to encourage Toby to trust himself and stop holding back, because when they play out there, there isn’t one single player who would. This is practice. This is hockey, and Holden seems to have a problem with that. It's clear that not everyone appreciates being used as a stepping stone to help their teammates and their development.Betas and their fucking egos.
I’m not here to play games though. I have a job to do, whether Holden likes it or not.
“Do you have a problem, Woods?” I question, refusing to fuck around with whatever male posturing bullshit this newest attempt at unsettling me is.
I won’t have it.
Not in my first week on the job.
Holden rolls his shoulders, making himself far too comfortable in my space.
“You don’t belong here.”
Short and straight to the point.
“Gee, Holden. Why don’t you tell me how you really feel?” His smile doesn’t falter. If anything, the bastard looks amused.
“Oh, I think I just did.” I let out an astonished huff at his audacity, though there is nothing funny about the sound. I’m tired. Correction, I’m exhausted, and I’m already sick to fucking death of having to defend myself. Of needing to have a backbone for a position that is rightfully mine. I shouldn’t have to earn it. Shouldn’t have to answer for it, especially to the likes of a player. That whole boy next door look hadn’t fooled me for long.Underneath that fuck boy persona is just another red blooded control freak of a man. I don’t know why or how they’ve done it, but it feels like I have to report to them. Like they are the ones leading the charge here and not me. But apparently, I have no other choice but to remind him who the fuck runs this show.
“The thing is, Holden, you know absolutely fucking nothing about me. Not anything more than my name and a designation that has fuck all to do with what my job is or the legacy I’ll be carrying for the rest of my life. So, all of your pretty little thoughts mean absolutely nothing to me, Beta.”
Leaning forward, I rest my hands on my desk, unable to hide my smirk as Holden’s attention is drawn to my breasts that push together for his viewing.
“I am the coach now. Therefore, what I say goes. And, I don’t appreciate little fuck boy Betas or their seemingly scary packmates coming in here and thinking that they’re going to boss me around. Not gonna happen.”
