When I jerked away from him, he chuckled. “Speaking of, I assume you’re prepared to perform your marital duty no matter what?”
Refusing to look at him, I replied, “I am.”
Father jerked my chin to where I had to face him. “I mean it, Drea. There can be no doubt in Raphael’s mind that from the start of your marriage, he’s the only one who has had you.”
Once again, I bit my tongue from replying that Rafe already knew I wasn’t a virgin. “Trust me. I get it.”
Father stared at me a few more moments before nodding his head. “Good.”
Thankfully, he eased back in his seat and didn’t speak to me again until we arrived at the church. Two attendants stood waiting to help me out of the car. They then rushed around fluffing my dress and adjusting my veil.
Once I was pronounced perfect, we started in the church. After entering the atrium, I feared lightning streaking from the sky to knock me dead. After all, I was sin walking. A liar. A fornicator. A deceiver in the bonds of holy matrimony.
And the biggest one of all: unwed and pregnant.
At least that’s how my father and his cronies would’ve seen me. The hypocrisy wasn’t lost on me that they could hold their heads up considering the innocent blood they’d spilled along with the not-so-innocent.
But that wasn’t my faith.
My faith was love and forgiveness–the very emotions my earthly father was incapable of ever giving me.
Once the wedding party was assembled, the massive organ struck the opening notes ofCanon in D. Of the ten bridesmaids wearing slate blue dresses and carrying oversized bouquets of wildflowers, I only truly cared for Bianca and Audrianna. Most of them were either cousins or the daughters of high-ranking members of the Caruso regime.
The music came to an end, and the wedding coordinator waved me forward. After reluctantly slipping my arm through Father’s, we took our place to walk down the aisle. With the strains ofHere Comes the Brideechoing through me, I forced myself to put one foot in front of the other.
Physically, my steps along the marble felt like sloughing through mud. Emotionally, it was more torturous than I’d ever imagined. Since signing the marriage contract, I’d envisioned this moment. The final act of binding myself to Rafe in holy matrimony was always going to be hard. But having the man that I loved standing next to him while I did it was impossible.
The closer I drew to the altar, the harder it was not to look at my feet. I knew seeing Leo would be my undoing.
When we reached the altar, I finally dared to sweep my focus from the floor. But the moment I locked eyes with Leo, my heart dropped. He was so very handsome in his tux. I wanted nothing more than to sidestep Rafe and go to him.
“You may be seated,” the priest instructed.
After the crowd sat down, the priest smiled at Rafe and me. As he began the ceremony, I desperately tried focusing on his face so I wouldn’t try to look at Leo. I couldn’t even give attention to my groom because there was a chance I would also see Leo.
“Raphael and Andrea, have you come here to enter into marriage without coercion, freely and wholeheartedly?” the priest asked.
Seriously?Thiswas a question I had to answer? Since the Father hadn’t read the vows yesterday, I sure as hell wasn’t prepared.
A marriage without coercion.
Was there a mafia bride alive who actually answered that question honestly and truthfully? I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it all.
I wanted to shake my head in defiance.
I wanted to tell the priest and the congregation how this entire marriage was very much against my will.
Instead, I thought of my baby and Vittoria. I thought of all the mafia daughters forced against their will. Dutifully, I replied, “I have.”
And then Rafe echoed, “I have.”
Nodding, the priest asked, “Are you prepared, as you follow the path of marriage, to love and honor each other for as long as you both shall live?”
My chest clenched tightly at the reference to love. More than anything in the world, I hoped I would come to love Rafe like I did my brothers, especially Adamo. But how could there ever be more than brotherly love between us when I loved his brother?
Beside me, I knew the same sentiment was echoing through Rafe’s mind. He could love and honor Maeve, but it would be different with me.
“I am,” we echoed in a resigned tone.
