Page 24 of His Brand of Passion

But it did, Zoe filled in silently. It always had. It had been silently and implicitly understood in her family that nothing she ever endured would compare to what Millie had happen to her. She had never attempted to try, had armoured herself with insouciance instead. It was how she’d handled life: lift your chin and laugh it off. Except now she couldn’t. Now she was raw, exposed and vulnerable, hating how much weakness was on display.

‘You shouldn’t be there alone,’ Millie said when Zoe hadn’t said anything—couldn’t. ‘Don’t close yourself off, Zoe. I know how that goes. It’s okay for a little while, and sometimes it’s what you need. But you can’t hide forever.’

‘This is hardly forever.’

‘How long are you planning on staying on St Julian’s?’

‘I don’t know.’ She didn’t have any reason to return to New York, she thought. She no longer worked at the café, and Aaron had arranged a month’s leave of absence from the community centre.

And, even when she was able to resume her work as an art therapist, what about her life? Her friends? She’d kept so much from them over the last few months, and now she felt so changed from the carefree, insouciant woman—girl—she’d been before.

‘Zoe?’ Millie prompted gently. ‘Maybe you should come back to New York. You could stay with me and Chase.’

‘No.’ The word came out too quickly, involuntary and immediate. Instinctive. ‘That’s very kind of you, Millie, but I’m a grown woman. I need to stand on my own two feet.’ Even if she wasn’t doing that now.

‘Then perhaps you should reach out to Aaron,’ Millie said after a moment. ‘I wouldn’t have said this when we talked before, but he cares about you, Zoe. I could tell. He’s really worried about you.’

‘I can’t.’ It was all she could manage.

‘Is there something I don’t know about, something about your relationship?’

Zoe closed her eyes. ‘We don’t have a relationship.’

‘I thought you were thinking of marrying him.’

‘That was when there was a baby.’ She dragged a breath into her lungs. ‘When there was a reason.’

‘And now?’ Millie asked quietly.

‘There’s nothing.’

‘It didn’t seem that way when I talked to Aaron.’

‘All right then, there’s not enough.’ He would never love her. Strange, how she’d convinced herself it hadn’t mattered when she’d been pregnant. Now, with the nothingness that had replaced her hope, she realised how much it did. How much she needed it.

‘Maybe you should give him a chance,’ Millie suggested.

‘You’re the one who said he was a big jerk,’ she snapped. ‘And that he’d break my heart and not even care.’

‘Has he?’ Millie asked quietly.

‘No!’ Because I won’t let him.

‘Oh, Zoe…’ Millie sighed. ‘I just don’t want you to be on your own. What if—what if I came down? Spent a few days with you? It could be…Well, I won’t say fun.’ She let out a wobbly laugh. ‘But it would be good to see you. I feel like I haven’t seen you properly since I got married.’

‘I know.’ And, even though she’d been deliberately avoiding Millie for most of that time, Zoe knew then that she missed her sister. The thought of seeing her again, having her sweep in and somehow rescue her was tempting—but impossible.

‘I miss you, Mills,’ she said. ‘And I’ll see you when I get back. But I need to be alone right now.’

‘I don’t like the thought of you out there by yourself.’

‘You came here by yourself,’ Zoe objected. ‘Remember? And met Chase.’

‘Are you hoping to meet a Chase?’ Millie teased gently.

‘There’s only one Chase.’ And there was only one Aaron. With a pang Zoe knew which one she wanted to be with.

Aaron spent the flight back to New York focused on work. He forced himself not to think of Zoe, of the accusations she’d spat at him like bullets. And like bullets they’d wounded him, made him bleed. Did he care about her now because he felt guilty? It almost seemed like the easy answer when the truth was far more damning.

He cared about her. Full stop. Forget about what they’d been planning before. He cared about her, and it terrified him.

Resolutely he turned back to his work. A mysterious shareholder was quietly buying up stocks in Bryant Enterprises, and Aaron had no idea who it was. Still, he sensed the danger; he’d always sensed the danger, always felt as if he were teetering on the edge of the precipice of disaster. Bankruptcy. Ruin. Shame.

The legacy of his father, the inheritance he’d been given and hidden not just from the world, but his own family. The shame he didn’t want anyone to discover.

Halfway through the flight, he broke down and called Millie. It was an awkward conversation, but a necessary one. He didn’t want Zoe to be completely isolated and alone. She needed someone, even if it wasn’t him.

His mobile phone rang as he landed in New York. Glancing at the luminous screen, Aaron saw that it was his brother Chase, no doubt checking up on him after his phone call to Millie.

‘Chase.’

‘Hey, Aaron. How’s Zoe?’

‘Not all that great, as you probably know from your wife,’ Aaron answered tersely.

‘Millie’s worried about her.’

‘Of course she is. Zoe has gone through a very difficult time.’

‘She thinks she shouldn’t be alone.’

Aaron gritted his teeth. Like he needed to be told. ‘I agree.’

‘So?’ Chase prompted. ‘Why aren’t you there?’

Aaron felt his fingers ache from gripping the phone so tightly. ‘Because she doesn’t want me there.’

‘I don’t think Zoe is in a position to know what she wants.’

Aaron felt a tiny flicker of doubt—or was it hope? ‘She seemed pretty sure,’ he said gruffly.

‘You said yourself she’s going through a tough time. She’s grieving, Aaron. She’s probably not making sense, even to herself.’

‘I don’t know,’ Aaron said after a moment, and he heard how uncertain he sounded. And he never sounded uncertain, never showed any weakness or doubt. ‘Look,’ he said in a stronger voice, ‘it’s none of your business anyway.’

‘Zoe is Millie’s sister, so that makes it my business,’ Chase answered. ‘And you’re my brother. Aaron, go back. Help her.’

Aaron closed his eyes, felt his throat thicken. He swallowed and forced himself to speak. ‘I don’t know how.’

‘Then tell her exactly that,’ Chase said gently. ‘I think she’ll understand.’

One of his staff had come into the main area of the plane, ready to assist. Grimly Aaron tossed his phone aside. ‘We’ll have to refuel,’ he said. ‘And then we’re heading back to St Julian’s.’

Zoe sat curled up in an armchair in the living room of the villa, the sliding glass doors open to the beach. A gorgeous sunset was streaking across the sky in technicolour glory, sending melting rays of gold and orange over the placid sea, yet she barely noticed it.

She’d spent one day alone and she was ready to climb the walls. Climb out of her own skin, because she couldn’t stand it anymore. Couldn’t stand herself. She drew in a shuddering breath and forced the emotion back. She couldn’t deal with it, would never be able to deal with it.

She heard the door open and looked up, expecting one of the staff returning to clear away the dinner she’d barely touched. Instead her heart seemed to stop right in her chest, for Aaron stood in the foyer looking tired, rumpled and utterly wonderful.

Zoe swallowed, half rising from her chair. ‘What are you doing here?’

Aaron’s gaze narrowed in on her and he tugged at his tie. Funny, how he always wore suits yet he always took his tie off as soon as possible, shed it with a flicker of relief as if he was finally just a little bit free.

‘What am I doing here?’ he repeated as he came towards her. ‘The real question is, why did I ever leave?’ He dropped to his knees in front of her. ‘I’m sorry, Zoe. I never should have left you alone, not even for a minute.’

She stared at him incredulously, longing to touch him, yet afraid to. ‘You must have flown to New York and straight back again.’

‘That’s exactly what I did.’

She shook her head, her throat thick with tears. ‘I was trying to make you leave.’

‘I know you were.’

‘Then why—why did you come back?’

‘Because I’m not going to let you push me away. Because I want to be here, with you, working this out together.’

‘I shouldn’t have—I shouldn’t have said those things to you.’

‘Why did you?’ Aaron asked quietly. ‘Are you angry at me?’

Zoe opened her mouth to deny it and then realised she couldn’t. ‘I don’t know,’ she whispered. ‘I know I shouldn’t be.’

Aaron shook his head, his eyes dark. ‘Maybe you should.’

‘Why?’

‘Because,’ he said bleakly, ‘I didn’t want our child at the start. At least, I convinced myself I didn’t.’

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