“You did, butIwas there,” she cut me off, her voice rising with every word. “Not anyone else.Me. I stood by you. I gave up on my dreams. I allowed you to treat me however you wanted because I loved you and because Ithoughtdeep down, you loved me, too. Because I was the only one who believed in us. Because I believed in you more than myself. I believed in you when you didn’t believe in yourself. And for five years, you stayed silent. Igrievedus, and I know you were having the roughest time, but of everyone in your life, I caused you no pain. You broke my heart into irreparable pieces, and you didn’t care. You weren’t there to see how badly it broke me. I did everything; every fucking thing for us, andyouthrew it away. And then you think you dare tocome here and get fucking jealous of a kiss on the cheek? And get mad and say an apology, and it’ll be fine? It may work with your girls back in the city, but not me.”
Her words hit me like a barrage of arrows, each one piercing deeper than the last. I stood there, shocked, unsure of what to say, but knowing I’d be pathetic to stand there in silence. Her eyes were filled with a mixture of fury and pain, her chest heaving with the intensity of her emotions.
I yearned to pour out my soul to her, yet my words dissolved into a silent ache in my throat.
“Nina,” I began, my voice soft and pleading, “I know I hurt you. I know I made terrible mistakes, and I can’t undo the past. But please, let me try to make things right. Let me show you I’ve changed. But don’t stand here and tell me you were the only one who believed in us. I believe in us. I believe in you.”
She shook her head, tears glistening in her eyes. “You don’t get it, do you? It’s not about changing. You broke my heart and walked away like it was nothing. And now, you think you can waltz back into my life and fix everything with an apology?”
Her words hung in the air, a heavy silence settling between us. I could see the depth of her pain, the scars I had left behind, and it tore me apart.
“I don’t expect anything from you,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. “But I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere this time. I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust again, to prove I’m not the person who hurt you.”
She looked at me, her eyes searching mine for any sign of sincerity. For a moment, I thought I saw a flicker of something—hope, maybe—but anger quickly overshadowed it.
The silence between us felt like an open wound, raw and festering. She held the gown tightly, her grip fierce, as though it could shield her from me. “You don’t get to come back,” she said, her voice thick with barely restrained anger. “You think you canthrow a few million dollars around and erase what you did?”
I flinched, but I didn’t look away. “It’s never about the money.”
Her eyes narrowed, her gaze flashing with both hurt and fury. “Isn’t it? Because five million dollars, Ronan? For a show,myshow. Throwing mo—”
“I’d give it all up if that’s what you needed; if that’s what youwantedme to do.You know that.” I took a step closer, my voice softer now, but no less intense. “It was never about the money, Nina.”
Her laugh was bitter, almost hollow, and she shook her head. “God, you really think saying that changes anything? Do you know what it’s been like to put myself back together after you shattered everything?”
I clenched my fists, struggling to keep the desperation from spilling out. “Christmas eight years ago,” I said, barely able to hold her gaze. “Do you remember?”
She tensed, her face contorting with a flicker of disbelief before she forced herself to look away. “What are you talking about?”
“The warehouse show,” I continued, my voice rough. “The dress you designed. The one you were so proud of that night… This is it, isn’t it?”
Her shoulders stiffened as she stared at the fabric. “You don’t… you don’t get to say that,” she whispered, her voice cracking.
“I remember it,” I replied, my voice unsteady. “I remember everything about that night.”
She finally looked at me, and I saw the walls she’d carefully built around herself crumbling, even as she tried to reinforce them with anger. “You think that matters now?”
“I know I have no right to ask you for anything,” I said, voice low. “But if there’s even the smallest chance, Nina… I’d give up everything.”
She let out a shaky breath. “It’s not that simple.”
“I know,” I said, finally taking a step back, even though everypart of me wanted to reach for her. “I’ll wait, however long it takes. It’s never been about anything or anyone but you.”
She turned her back to me, and I heard a sniffle. I hesitated for a moment before walking closer, tentatively placing a hand on her back. She shivered at my touch, then gently moved away.
“Abbiamo finito? Non c’è davvero più alcuna speranza?13” I called out, desperation creeping into my voice.
She stopped once more, turning to face me. Her eyes were wet with unshed tears, but her expression was resolute. “Goodnight.”
With those words, she walked away, leaving me standing there, feeling the pressure of her finality settle over me like a heavy cloak.
“Fuck,” I whispered.
Chapter Twelve
NINA
Seven Years Earlier
