Before he could get one in, I slammed the door shut, bolting each lock with a fierce finality. Standing there, chest heaving, I willed my pulse to steady.
I’d be damned if I let anyone think they had a right to my past. It was mine alone. No matter how messy, complicated, and full of choices, no one else could understand.
Chapter Twenty-one
RONAN
Present Day
ITALY
“Rachel,” I called out as we brunched before I visited my aunt, her eyes alight with curiosity. “I need heart-shaped milk and dark chocolates from Tuscani Cioccolato S.r.l. delivered to Nina with a note.”
Her pen hovered over her notebook, eyebrows raised. “Quantity?” she asked, tilting her head with a smile.
“A couple of boxes,” I replied, a hint of nostalgia creeping in. “Maybe ten. Chocolates are her favorite sweets.”
Her face softened, a trace of awe coloring her expression. “Wow,” she murmured, almost to herself. Then, looking up atme, she added, “I’ve only read about this kind of love or seen it in movies, but it’s real for you.”
I smiled, feeling warmth rise with the thought of Nina. “She’s the one for me. I need to show her I’m the one for her.”
Rachel leaned forward, her tone cautious yet curious. “Is that hard?”
“It is,” I admitted, my mind drifting to countless memories. “But it’s worth it. Without her, life’s like a barren landscape because even the stars seem dimmer. It feels as if every breath is just… longing.”
Rachel watched me, nodding slowly, an empathetic glint in her eye. “That’s beautiful,” she murmured. “To feel that way about someone must be overwhelming.”
“Very,” I agreed, my voice soft. “But loving someone that deeply, despite the struggle, gives life its meaning. It’s like finding a piece of yourself in someone else.”
Her gaze softened further, and she leaned in. “Does she know? About how you feel?”
I hesitated, feeling a familiar pang of uncertainty. “I hope she does,” I finally replied. “But with us… It’s more delicate. My actions have to speak louder than any words.”
She reached out, resting a comforting hand on mine. “Love has a way of making itself known.”
I nodded, her words settling in. Maybe she was right. Perhaps my efforts would finally reach Nina. Passing the note over to Rachel, I sealed it in a fuchsia envelope stamped with my insignia, and she left to get it sent.
The phone pinged with a plethora of messages from my group chat with Arnoldo seeking gym buddies, Dillon telling him to fuck off, Lucio and Alex keeping the peace, and Mikkel agreeing to go. That summed up every single conversation we had.
I didn’t even bother responding. My car had arrived, and I made my way to Monumental Cemetery in the heart ofMilan, where the air felt heavier today, laden with memories that whispered through the cypress trees and lingered over the cemetery where my parents rested.
I couldn’t believe it had been six years.
Six years of missing their laughter, warmth, and love. I stood before their gravestone, tracing their names, hoping the touch would bring them back. Lucia and Renaldo Romano—taken too soon by cancer, but their love and wisdom remained.
“I’m trying to get Nina back,” I whispered, kneeling beside them. “I know you loved her, Mom and Dad.” Tears blurred my vision as I confessed my failures, the moments I felt I hadn’t lived up to their legacy. “I try. I do, but sometimes I slip up. I wished I could have saved you… fought harder.”
But I took comfort knowing they were together, watching over me. “I talk to you both, you know. Therapy, trying to do right by you.Vi amo entrambi, caramente. Ci risentiremo presto.26”
I stood breathing in the summer air, lilies mingling with freshly cut grass. After one last glance, I adjusted my jacket and headed toward Aunt Rosa’s flower shop, Il Giardino dei Fiori Rosa, tucked into a quiet corner of Arezzo. It was more than a business; it was home, with ivy climbing the walls and flowers spilling from the windows above where she lived. This was her dream for retirement, so of course, I had made it happen.
“Ciao! Salve! Ciao,27” she shouted and ran over to me. “My boy, Ronan! How are you?” she asked, enveloping me in the most comforting hug.
Rosa had been my mother’s best friend and remained by Lucio’s and my side after her passing. She celebrated our milestones, cooked for us when we couldn’t manage, and became a second parent. I could never repay her, but I’d sure try.
“Ah,Zia Rosa,28” I greeted warmly, struck by her radiant presence. “You look absolutely radiant today. I wish I had brought something for you.”
She chuckled and waved off my concern as we strolled over to her cozy sitting area, enveloped by the intoxicating scent of the most exquisite flowers I had ever laid eyes on.
