I raise an eyebrow. “‘Light of my stars’? That’s a strong meaning to ascribe to someone who isn’t a lover.”
Cancassi chuckles delicately. “That is such a human sentiment. You all have such an... emphasis on romantic love. As if that’s the only one that matters.”
“According to my mother, it is,” I mutter but force those thoughts aside. It was a lifetime ago that she tried to get me to marry. One I’m very happy to see behind me now.
“Well, your mother is wrong,” Cancassi says simply. “Love comes in so many different shades, and Olbric means far more to me than just romance. Even if we never cast with each other again, I couldn’t stand losing his company. Company that I’m missing fiercely right now.”
“I know.” Each absence feels like a hole carved into the Crux. “I feel it, too.”
“Seems like you’re keeping yourself distracted, at least. I tried to sleep, failed, went for a ride, and now I’mstilltoo crotchety to try and rest,” they murmur as their keen eyes glance over my scattered notes. “Whatisall of this, anyway?”
Arlon’s chair feels so large as I sink back into it. “I may have made a bold promise to the Queen.”
“Oh?”
My grin is strained. “I may have told her that I wanted to restore the people of Straetham’s trust in magic?”
Cancassi blinks before they burst out laughing. It takes them a moment to realize I’m not laughing with them. “No. You’re serious?”
“I swear, I had aplanwhen I offered up the idea. But then that plan felt inadequate, so I moved on to adifferentplan, and then, well...” I groan and bury my face in my hands. “Do you think I’ve gone mad?”
I blink owlishly as they take my hands and squeeze. “Not mad. Stressed, certainly, but not mad.” Their touch is a comfort. “It’s a wicked problem to face, and a bold promise, but it’s an admirable goal.”
“Admirable, andextremelydifficult to make good on,” I mutter.
Cancassi chuckles as they turn my hand over, looking critically at my ink-stained fingers. “Good thing you’re not one to back down from a challenge, are you, Grandmaster?”
I snort a laugh. “You know, Arlon told me that he thought it was going to be near impossible to get the Crown’s approval after what my sister did?”
Cancassi hums as they release my hands. “Well, you know what they say - nothing is impossible with magic. Maybe that sentiment is true elsewhere.”
“Assuming I remember how tomakeit. I haven’t even cum since my godsdamned conjuration mastery,” I mutter, rubbing my tired eyes. Arlon had told me to remember that magic is just as much about pleasure as pain, and I’ve been sorely lacking in the former. “An orgasm or two and a godsdamned nap sounds amazing.”
“And you need someone to deliver? Oh no, twist my arm.” Their voice drips with sarcasm even as their eyes twinkle with amusement.
I chuckle, pushing my curls from my face. The idea is enticing, but then I realize another thing I haven’t done. “Fuck, but I need to talk to the rest of the Crux at dinner. We’re likely not the only ones feeling... tense about things.”
Cancassi sets their cane down and rises to their feet. “You know, you haven’t been sworn in as Grandmaster.”
“‘Sworn in?’” I repeat, eyebrow raised. Arlon told me that there was some manner of ceremony when he became Grandmaster, but that’s besides the point. “I’m not Grandmaster yet.”
“Alright,interimGrandmaster, then,” they say, rolling their eyes.
“What do you have in mind?”
They tell me, and I think that maybe they’re right. An official swearing in sounds like exactly what I need.
MY HEART RACES AS Istand in front of the collected wizards of the Crux. Or at least the ones who are available for dinner tonight. According to Arlon’s rosters, the Crux currently has one hundred and thirty active and practicing wizards. Though of that number, more than half of them spend their time off-site like Garrett and Bridgette, or my own parents.
Sitting scattered among the tables tonight are about fifty people. It’s a high number. Usually at least a dozen or two wizards are out on active assignments at any given time, but since the Crown-sanctioned ones have dried up, a lot of wizards have been left at home. Yet all eyes turn to me as I mount the dais at the front of the room. There are many familiar faces among the crowd, though I notice that Margeurite isn’t among them.
“Looking good, Galiva,” Iona calls from one of the tables, her voice light and teasing.
I flash a smile, my face heating. Cancassi dressed me up. A black leather underbust corset cinches my waist tight, making me aware of every breath I take. It accentuates my breasts, which are barelycontained by the plunging linen shirt Cancassi loaned me. I’m wearing a flowing black skirt that sweeps the floor, though at Cancassi’s suggestion, I wore nothing underneath.
“I know it’s been a difficult couple of days,” I say, and the chatter across the mess hall quiets. “Watching some of our friends, casting partners, and lovers leave for an assignment is hard even under normal circumstances. I get that we’re all on edge.”
There are murmurs of affirmation. Everyone seems to be doing their best to keep their spirits up, but we all know what will happen if the talks fail. Wizards are protectors of the realm. If it comes to war, we are the front line, and that weight feels especially heavy now.
