Is this what attention feels like? I mean, guys don’t normally openly flirt with me like this. The only two guys who made it known they liked me were high-school boys. The attention feels different from Chase. More intense and overtly seductive. I don’t even know this guy. We met all of maybe eight hours ago, yet all I can think about is doing things to him I shouldn’t.
What is wrong with me?When did I become so easy?
He boxes me in, placing his hands on both sides of the counter behind me, and leans down to whisper in my ear. “I told you I liked a challenge.”
Damn.
Breathe, Lydia.
But do I even want to? Whatever this feeling is, it’s way stronger than alcohol. It turned my brain off the second he said my name. I can’t stop myself from chasing more of it.
“Would you like me to keep running?” I ask him.
He looks at me with this hunger in his eyes, like he just found his prey. Joke’s on him, though. I’m the one doing the hunting tonight. I’ll be damned if I don’t take whatever this high I’m feeling to the next level. The alcohol took away the shyness…and the pure need to drown in something other than my thoughts is doing the rest here.
He shakes his head no, and I know the strike will be easy—so does he.
“Is there a room upstairs?” I ask him, placing a hand on his chest.
His hands instantly go from the counter to my waist, never breaking eye contact. I jolt at the feeling of his hands on me, but I don’t push them away. It feels too good.
“Are you sure?”
It’s sweet that he asks. It actually makes me feel a little more comfortable, like he doesn’t want to take advantage of me, but he has no problem with me taking advantage of him.
“Positive.”
He doesn’t say anything else, just takes my hand and leads me away. I stop and get Lani’s attention, telling her I’ll be right back, that if she finds Simone, tell her to text me, and we’ll all meet back up. She gives me a drunken thumbs up and then blows me a kiss, eyes half shut as I walk away.
* * *
People always say ‘post-nut clarity’ makes you regret what you did…realize you didn’t actually want to sleep with that person, that you were just in a lust-filled cloud that blinded you in the moment, but that couldn’t be further from what I feel right now. Chase was good, like toe-curling good, like turned my brain completely off and just enjoyed the fireworks good. Plus, I barely knew him. It’s not like I have any emotional attachment to him, so why would I feel bad? We used each other for what we wanted, and it felt good. That’s that. Did the prior alcohol make it easier to allow myself to just go for it? Yeah. But I would have still wanted to feel this high without the alcohol. I just would have been too chicken to do it.
I pull my dress back on, walking over to the attached bathroom in the room to fix my hair. Chase walks up behind me, shirtless, buttoning up his jeans.
“That was amazing,” he says, staring at me in the mirror.
I can’t help but blush, smoothing my hair down. “You’re welcome,” I tease. The alcohol is still very alive in my bloodstream, and I feel good. That must be where the confidence is coming from.
He pretends to be offended. “Hey, I gave you my A-game back there.”
We both laugh as I turn around and walk under the arm he has propped up against the bathroom door frame.
He turns to look at me as I grab my phone from the bed. “You should let me get your number. There’s no way that wasn’t good enough to just be a one-time thing.”
I let out a small laugh.
“Or…we can just see each other when we see each other. This doesn’t have to be anything more thanthat,” I say, looking at whoever’s bed that is we just defiled.
He just nods, agreeing towhat I’m offering. “Well,that…was some of the best sex I’ve ever had. So I hope I do see you again.”
Damn, he definitely knows how to boost a girl’s confidence, and if the mere thought of having a crush on someone or relationships didn’t scare the living shit out of me to the point where I refuse to entertain one, I’d probably be screwed right now with him. He knows all the right things to say; I’ll give him that. But all of that would require me to have a heart. And I lost that a long time ago.
I turn around, walking towards the door, and look back at him once more after I open it. “Then maybe I’ll see you around, Chase.”
“I hope so, Lydia.”
40
