“And you were his girlfriend. We both have been dealing with a lot.”
Girlfriend.
I don’t know why that word puts such a bad taste in my mouth now. I can’t change it, though. It’s just a part of my story…forever.
I look around, confusion finally hitting me. “John…why…why are you talking to me? Don’t you know everything that’s—”
“I know what everyone is saying, Lydia,” he interrupts, “and I know what Eli said…but it doesn’t mean I believe any of it.”
His words stun me. “You…don’t?”
John shakes his head slowly. “I watched you two. I knew Eli better than anyone, we grew up together. He had a lot of demonswaybefore you came around.” His voice lowers. “I saw how possessive he got with you and how toxic it was starting to get…but I didn’t know it was gettingthatbad. He stopped talking to me, and I really wish he hadn’t. I wish I had known, or stepped in, or done something. But I really didn’t know everything that was going on. I felt in the dark a lot with him after y’all started dating, like he was hiding a lot from me that he didn’t want me to know about.”
“It’s not your fault,” I say, trying to reassure him.
“Did he ever…put his hands on you, Lydia?”
The question catches me off guard, and I shiver involuntarily.
John clears his throat gently, pulling me back. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—” he starts, guilt etched into his face.
I nod, tears stinging my eyes. “Yes,” I whisper. “He did.”
His expression falls. “Geez, Lydia, I’m so sorry. Fuck, I didn’t know. I swear, if I had—”
He pulls me into a hug, and I freeze, not expecting the contact. After a moment, I finally relax and embrace him back.
It’s the first time I’ve hugged any guy since being with Eli, and as weird as it feels, I need the comfort.
“It’s okay,” I tell him. “I’m sorry…I know he was your best friend. I know you probably don’t want to think about him like that—”
He pulls back, eyes filled with sincerity. “That doesn’t matter. Hurting you, hurting anyone…iswrong. I should’ve seen it. I should’ve done something.” He exhales, frustrated with himself. “I’m so sorry. Wewerefriends, though, Lydia. I knew what he said wasn’t you…I even tried to reach out to you after everything happened, but you never answered.”
“I had to change my number,” I explain quietly.
He nods, understanding. “It got that bad?”
I nod back without saying anything.
“Where’s your phone? Let me put my number in…just so you have it. In case you ever wanna reach out and talk. I’m always here for you. I know this has to be a lot to deal with. I’m happy to see you back, though.”
“You don’t have to do this,” I tell him, handing him my phone. “I don’t want you being seenwith me or do anything that will cause you backlash…”
“Lydia, stop. I couldn’t care less what these people think. I care more about being on the right side and not seeing someone get torn down who doesn’t deserve it.”
“So, you really don’t think I’m the villain everyone is making me out to be, huh?”
He looks up from my phone, holding my gaze. “No, not even a little.”
He hands me back my phone, and I take it, sliding it into the side of my backpack. “Thank you. I uh…better get going to class.”
“I’ll see you around, Lydia. Seriously, though, text me if you ever need anything or just want to talk.”
He gives me a side hug before I walk off, heading to class. I pull my phone back out and send Simone a quick text so she doesn’t start worrying.
Lydia:So far, so good. Lots of stares, but no one has said anything to me. Maybe I can do this after all. Love you, I’ll text you later
Lydia: Oh…John just talked to me. That was weird, but good? I’ll have to call you after school and tell you everything!
