Astoria,
You have held many names, spoken on many tongues, but none are so sweet as the truth. Spoken on mine. My darling curse. My sweet night. Wild, unruly girl, with emeralds for eyes… I fear you may be my undoing. As you linger between life and death, uncertain which way to be led…
Choose life. For your sake, and mine.
I have not known peace since you. So if this is love, let that be enough. Or I fear I must let it die.
Wholly yours, G
Tears pricked my eyes as they settled on the curved ending of his initial. He loved me. Could that even be possible? Was it possible? Except his words were filled with sorrow, a crushing weight I couldn’t ignore as I read the letter through again.
He didn’t want to love me.
I was his heart’s demise.
I wiped the tears away, folded the letter, and placed it back on top of his scattered belongings. And that’s why you don’t snoop through things that don’t belong to you.
IthoughtI’d known love when I married James. But this wasn’t that. This was all-consuming fire in my veins, stars behind my eyes, rattling my teeth, a riot on my senses…
It felt like the moment my gaze first fell on my newborn children. Or the sunlight warming my face on a cold, cruel day. It was a glimpse of the beyond, whether heaven or hell, in a single, stolen moment.
And he didn’t want it. How could he? My existence alone had upended his.
But I wanted it. I wantedhim.
He spoke of truth as if it would set me free…
Well, this was mine.
I wanted Grim the same way I wanted to breathe. As fiercely as I wanted my children back from the dead. As desperately as I wanted to know my grandmother’s name.
A glimmer of light caught my eye. I turned from the desk, wandering toward the shelves, committing to memory the things he had chosen to keep, those few precious objects that had survived the churning tides of centuries. I wanted to know more. Everything.
Who he was before he became this—Death incarnate. If there had ever been a life before the end.
A faint, otherworldly glow pulled me closer.
At first glance, I thought it was a standing globe. I was wrong. It mimicked the design, the spindle-legged base, the wide sphere set to roll, but it wasn’t printed with any map of the world. It was made of milky, translucent glass. I cocked my head, squinting to make out the words etched in gold along the side.
“Astoria!” Day called, startling me. I hesitated, reluctant to leave the letter on Grim’s desk or the strange globe.
The glass swirled, reminding me of smoke rising.
“Birthday girl! Wake up!” Day yelled again, combined with the sound of Reaper’s paws padding down the hall.
I looked back at the globe. I’d come back later. Besides Grim would probably be gone for a while. Leaving the letter, I set everything back how it was, and tip-toed out of Grim’s office, leaving the door just as I found it.
“There you are!” Day beamed, as I walked into the kitchen. Wrapping me up in a giant bear hug, he spun me around the room as my toes brushed the tile. “Happy birthday, Storybook.”
“Agh—” I groaned, wiggling out of his tight grip. “Thanks Day.” I dropped to my feet, glancing around the dressed-uproom. The counter was littered with every breakfast food, from muffins to parfaits, pastries, eggs…
“I may have gotten carried away,” Day murmured, scratching his jaw. “But in my defense, it’s the first birthday I’ve ever celebrated.” He handed me a plate, gesturing to the spread.
I dug into the cinnamon rolls first, cutting out the center roll from the pan. “You’ve never celebrated a birthday before?”
Day rummaged through the cabinets, pulling two goblets down. “Nope. Which is why you are going to let me celebrate you to my heart’s content.”
“Alright,” I conceded, taking the orange juice he held out. It had been a while since I celebrated a birthday and I could think of nobody better to spend it with. “Nothing weird. Nothing crazy, and absolutely no singing.” I narrowed my eyes at him, waiting for him to give me his word.
