“I just couldn’t bear to see you. It’s the most unbearable thing, you losing Beth. I couldn’t face you, Kate. I was too scared ... of this.”
“But I’ve needed you,” Kate said. She rarely cried except, for some reason, with Lulu. She tried to blink back a million burning tears, but they poured down her face.
“Our girl, our South,” Lulu said.
“Lulu, I saw her. I’m the one who found her,” Kate said. “She was broken, Lu. Her head was cracked. Her neck ...”
“Oh, Kate,” Lulu said, holding her tighter.
“My little sister,” Kate said. “Her beautiful eyes were so cloudy, staring into nothing. The last thing she saw was someone killing her.”
“This is what I was so scared of,” Lulu whispered, stroking her hair. “Not being able to face what I know you’ve been through. Why did you have to find her? Of everyone, why did it have to be you? I don’t want it in your mind, that sight of her. I want you to remember her alive and happy, our girl ...”
“I’m so glad it was me,” Kate said. “It was as if ... I was taking care of her, for the last time. Being with her. Not turning away. I had to see her, Lulu. It would have been ten times worse if I hadn’t. She was so alone at the end. And she lay there all that time, by herself in that cold room, and no one knew. I had to be the one to find her.”
“I should have been here,” Lulu said.
Kate pushed herself away to dry her tears. She nodded. “Yeah, you should have. I know what you said, but I still don’t get why you weren’t. Not really.” She waited for Lulu to reply, but Lulu just stared down at her feet, shaking her head.
Kate’s gaze fell upon Lulu’s leg, crisscrossed with thin bloody lines.
“What happened?” Kate asked.
“I had an incident at Little Beach. Barnacles.” Lulu paused. “Have you been through the path lately?”
“No,” Kate said.
“Kids sprayed paint all over the rocks,” Lulu said, the awkward non sequitur hovering between them.
Kate closed her eyes. The last time she’d been there was with Beth. This past June they had walked to Little Beach, along the water’s edge at dusk, looking for moonstones. The pebbles had glistened in the wet sand, opalescent in late-day amber light, lighting their path like tiny fallen moons.
“Are you okay?” Lulu asked, watching Kate, bringing her back to the present.
“I’m kicking Pete and Nicola out today. The locksmith is coming.”
“Can you imagine what Mathilda would say if she knew Pete was here? After what he’s put Beth and Sam through?” Lulu asked.
“She’d be apoplectic. Beth should have made them leave the minute she found out they were here.”
Lulu looked away, seeming to think about it. “Maybe she had other things on her mind.”
Of course Beth had had plenty on her mind, but the way Lulu said it made Kate feel uneasy. “What do you mean?” she asked.
Lulu didn’t reply.
“Well, my theory is it made her feel strong,” Kate said. “Like she had the power. Knowing she could get rid of them at any time.”
“She had a lot going on,” Lulu said.
“Yes, the pregnancy, running the gallery ...”
“Et cetera,” Lulu said.
Kate gave her a sharp glance. “Et cetera?Is there something you want to tell me?”
“No. I’m just upset. Who’s going to run the gallery now?” Lulu asked.
“Maybe I’ll have to.”
