“That would be great.” She nodded just as sirens shrieked in the distance. “Time to get to work,” she concluded, shoving off the wall as I did the same.
****
I walked in the door that night, exhausted. But overall it had been a good night. We’d been able to save the family brought in after their car rolled off an embankment. A lot of nights didn’t end with the same conclusion and I’d take the highs whenever I could get them. Now, I just wanted to hold my boy and tuck him in. I’d been missing him all day.
I could hear Cal’s deep murmur somewhere in the house and traced the sound to Mason’s temporary bedroom. He was holding Mason beside his crib, talking to him quietly. Mason’s head was on his shoulder and it was clear he was just moments from sleep.
It was such an intimate moment between them, I almost felt awkward standing there. I wasn’t used to sharing Mason and I wasn’t sure how to navigate my emotions.
An irrational burst of jealousy hit my chest as I watched Cal do what I wanted to be doing. Mason wasmychild.
We’d gotten too comfortable here. I didn’t want Mason to get used to a father figure that wasn’t permanent. It wasn’t fair to him. It wasn’t fair to me.
I slipped out of the room and went to mine, starting to pack up my things.
“You’re home.” Cal’s voice sounding from the doorway startled me.
I whirled to face him, the shirt I’d been in the middle of packing poised in my hand. “Yeah.”
His brow pinched. “You’re packing?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “I think it’s time Mason and I went back to the apartment.”
He leaned against the doorway. “Oh yeah, why’s that?” His tone was neutral but I could hear the tension coiled just beneath the surface.
“It doesn’t seem like there’s any danger. We should get out of your hair,” I replied, turning my back to him so I could continue packing.
His warmth hit my back as he moved in unbearably close. His hands came up from behind me, grabbing the shirt I held and throwing it on the bed. “What’s this really about?” His voice was a low murmur next to my ear.
I fought the whole-body shiver that threatened as my belly clenched in response to his proximity.
“Let me in, just an inch, babe. What’s going on in that gorgeous head?”
“I can’t get used to this and I don’t understand what’s happening,” I blurted.
He turned me in his arms, tipping my chin up to look at him. “Can’t get used to what exactly?”
I threw my hands up. “The help! I’ve always done things on my own. Even when Tim and I were together I was basically a single parent. I don’t want Mason to get used to it and then have it taken away.” I looked off to the side. “And… I don’t want that either.”
His finger hooked under my chin, bringing my gaze back to his. “Who says I’m going anywhere?” he asked, his voice a gentle rumble.
My face warmed with a blush I knew covered my skin all the way down to my chest. “But… you haven’t even really kissed me.” I murmured. “If you just want to be friends or just want to help out, I don’t want to be in your way…,” I blathered.
“Christ, babe, seriously?” He chuckled incredulously.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What?”
“I’d have you palm my cock right now to let you feel how hard I am just from being near you, but that might be overkill since—as you pointed out—I haven’t really kissed you yet. Not the way I want to, anyway.”
I swallowed hard, part of me wishing he’d do just that.
“You know why?”
I fought to find my voice. “Why what?” I rasped.
“Why I haven’t really kissed you yet?”
I shook my head.
