I ignored his use of “we” and instead bit into the buttered toast. It was simple but delicious and I hadn’t realized how hungry I was. He sat beside me on the couch, flipping on the TV as he drank his coffee. The silence between us felt remarkably natural at a time that couldn’t be more bizarre.
Despite being covered up in his clothing, I couldn’t have felt more naked. My emotions spun from grief to disbelief to fear, and as someone who was used to being alone, grappling with that in front of Maddox was more than I could handle.
“I think I’ll head back to bed,” I shared softly when I’d finished my toast. My entire body throbbed like a heartbeat, and despite just having woken up, I still felt as though I could sleep for a week. “Thanks for the toast; it was five star.” I tried to crack a smile but knew it fell short.
“You want me to come with you?” he asked, his gaze concerned as he took the empty plate and full coffee cup from me and placed them on the coffee table.
I shook my head even though a large part of me relished the thought. The idea of being alone with my thoughts wasn’t a welcome one, and despite how confused I felt about him, Maddox made me feel safe. “I just need some sleep. I’m sure I’m already cramping your style enough as it is without you needing to lie around with me all day. Go do your thing,” I coaxed. “I really appreciate you putting me up. I promise, as soon as I’ve had a bit more rest I’ll figure out how to get out of your hair.”
His hand gently grasping my arm halted my movements. “Francesca.” His tone stopped me in my tracks. “Baby, I want you here.”
I offered a weak smile. “Okay, well even if that’s true, you still don’t need to lie in bed with me all day. I’ll be fine,” I tried to assure him as I rose from the couch grimacing with pain.
He was beside me in an instant, his hand pressed to my back. “Let’s get you to bed.” He gently guided me to his room and lay me down in bed. “I’ll get you another pain pill.” He returned a few moments later with a pill and a glass of water.
I accepted both gratefully before burrowing under the covers.
He stood there for a moment as though torn. I wasn’t used to seeing him unsure about anything. Maddox was a man who knew what he wanted and how to get it.
“I’ll be right in the living room if you need me,” he said finally.
I nodded, closing my eyes, hoping I could keep the nightmares at bay.
Chapter 11
MADDOX
“Fuck,” I muttered quietly, staring at my closed bedroom door. Every instinct screamed at me not to leave her alone. I was not a man who second-guessed himself, who hesitated, but with Francesca looking so lost and in obvious pain I didn’t want to push her too hard.
It was killing me to see her like this and to feel so fucking helpless. It killed me the way my club had treated her, that I hadn’t demanded that she stay with me that day. I should have protected her more—done more. I’d been struggling to bring her back to me ever since.
I stood staring at my closed bedroom door, feeling like a stalker but not able to tear myself away.
Finally, my phone ringing in the kitchen forced me to walk away.
“Hi, Ma,” I greeted, half surprised she’d been able to hold off this long from checking in. I knew my pop had probably held her back.
“Hi, honey, how’s Francesca?”
If only my girl could hear the genuine concern in my mother’s voice.
I sighed, running a hand over my day-old whiskers. “About as well as anyone who almost died, lost everything, and thinks no one in my life trusts her.”
“What can we do?” she asked immediately.
I thought about that for a minute. It was my club’s way, my family’s way to do things together. But that wouldn’t work. Not yet. “Nothing yet. She’s overwhelmed enough as it is,” I explained. “I lost her trust,” I admitted, looking out my window, staring unseeingly at the mountain range in the distance.
“We all did, honey.” She sighed sadly. “Now, you’re not asking for my advice, but I’m your mother and I’m going to give it to you anyway.”
I fought a smile at her no-nonsense tone. My ma had the biggest heart of anyone I’d ever known. She also didn’t take any shit from anyone.
“That girl is hurting and she’s probably pushing you away out of self-preservation. With the direction her thoughts are likely headed, I’d bet that space isn’t going to help her much. She probably doesn’t even know what she needs right now—you need to be the one who does. Trust your gut, Mad, it’s never steered you wrong.”
I nodded in agreement. “Thanks, Ma.”
“I’ll give you a little more time but after that, Olivia and I want to come by and check on her ourselves. I’d bet the rest of the club will want to do the same.”
I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold them off much longer. “Yeah,” I agreed quietly. “Soon, but not yet. I’ll check back with you guys.”
