And I want to formally apologize for not properly splitting our assets during the divorce process.I hope I have not given you any undue distress, and look forward to our continuing amicable co-parenting relationship.
Are you being held at gunpoint?I shot back before I could help myself.
Ha ha ha ha hahe replied immediately, with a series of extremely insincere laughing emojis.
But that $200,000 in my bank account looked pretty real.
You supported me by staying at home for many years and it is the least I can do.
The least he could do? That didn’t sound like Perry at all.
I narrowed my eyes.
But it did sound like someone else I knew very well.
Do you want more? Do you want the minivan? I’ve told Bridget she has to give it up.
No, I texted back.I don’t need the minivan anymore. You know Abraham got me a new truck.
Apparently Asparagus worked fast. He was a great new recruit.
But I had the perfect use for this money.
Eagerly, I picked up the phone and called Laurie’s college, waiting impatiently to get patched through to the Financial Aid office.
Let’s get this done before Perry changes his mind!
“I’d like to put some money on Laurie Spencer’s account.”
She kept me on hold for the longest time.
“I’m sorry. That account’s already been paid in full.”
“Paid in full?” I shrieked. “Bywho?”
“It looks like a Mr. O’Sullivan paid for it. A Mr. Abraham O’Sullivan.”
The room swam around me as I heard the roar of a distant motorcycle and the phone slipped from my numb fingers.
Laurie’s entire college billpaid? Not having to worry about whether his major would please Perry or not? Not having to be afraid Perry would refuse to help and I’d have to scrape up as much as I could by myself?
Abraham pulled into the garage and I ran out, the ground still cold, but I could see the first hard green buds of spring on the trees.
And soon they’d be flowering. . .
“You paid for all of Laurie’s college tuition,” I said breathlessly. “You didn’t have to do that.”
Bonemangler’s big shitkicker boot knocked the kickstand down and he turned around.
“He’s a good kid.”
There were tears threatening to spill now.
“Thank you so much.”
Abraham looked sharply over at me, that magnificently cold and harsh face, the crooked nose. He looked gaunt, face lined with strain.
“I didn’t do it just to get your forgiveness. It’s done whether or not you forgive me. Because a kid doesn’t need to be 18 years old and worrying about his old man hating what he does.”
