“My father isn’t getting him back,” James says like a statement, a promise.
As the two of them head to the barn to fetch Hort and dress him in a bandaged disguise, I don’t immediately follow.
He won’t be the only one who needs to fake it, I tell myself. Take all the pain and direct it toward James Murphy. Act like you hate him. That’s the directive, the mission, because I can’t hurt anyone else wanting more than that.
I think even my dad can sense the tension in the car. Like weeks ago, James and I are plastered together and leaning away, trying and failing not to touch. Last time it was out of avoidance and awkwardness. This time I can’t look at him for an entirely different reason.
“You kids have to talk to me. I know something is going on,” Dad says after ten minutes of uncomfortable silence.
The worry flows out of me in a quick current. “I think Mr. Murphy knows I can craft bronze.”
My dad’s knuckles on the steering wheel go white. “How?”
“Because I saved Colm Ditters while spotting at the tournament.” Themore I think about it the more I wish I never volunteered or had let Colm fall into the water, exposed back and all.
“No,” James counters. “I’ve thought about it all last night. There’s no way. There’s no way my father would suspect and not ask me about it. He’d confront me first.”
Dad exhales slowly. “Okay. Is that it? Is that everything?”
I cut a glance at James as he does the same. I lean away even farther. There are certain things I may tell my dad, but not squeezed next to the boy who is my first crush, my first real kiss.
“Dr. Burke might suspect as well,” I add.
“That’s my fault,” James says.
“Did anything go right yesterday?”
A flush radiates into my face and I know I must be red. One thing went right. That kiss was right until I destroyed it.
“Farren got offered a full ride to Revers Academy,” James says casually.
I snap toward him, but he’s looking out the window, avoiding me.
“One I can’t take. It’s for riding,” I clarify before Dad gets too happy for me.
Dad squeezes my forearm in sympathy. “Oh, kiddo, is that why you were crying this morning?”
I flush in embarrassment and shame. I can sense James’s attention on the side of my face, Dad’s reassuring pressure on the other. I wish to escape every part of this situation, especially my thigh glued to James and the hum of warmth it provides. My body is putting up one hell of a fight for what it wants. James, it wants James.
“Yes, that’s why,” I answer Dad, wishing I had my own window to look out to avoid them both.
“I need you to promise me to not craft bronze or silver, Farren. No matter what happens with Bex. We can’t give them any proof.”
I clench my hands into fists. “I won’t.”
“James, you’ll be my primary assistant today. Can you do that?”
“Yes.” He sounds self-assured. Like a jerk, I feel the sharp pain of being replaced. Months ago, this exact scenario was center stage to my nightmares.Feeling like I’ve outed my entire family? Check. Worrying James Murphy would be better than me in the one skill set I’ve cultivated to win the scholarship? Check. Fearing a dragon’s life would be on the line because of my mistakes? Check.
The scariest thing, though, is knowing this day can get so much worse.
For the rest of the car ride, Dad reviews every basic evaluation exam with James. An agonizing forty minutes later, we pull up to the racing tracks less than twelve hours since I was here, messing up my life. James explodes out of the car when the truck halts in the dirt. How in the world did I ever think he hated me before? Because this level of I-can’t-even-be-near-you-another-second is achingly obvious.
In front of us on the same patch of ground we witnessed Hendrix suffer, Bex is tied down with silver-lined rope. This is serious. Rope like that is only used in the direst of situations.
“The tranquilizer wore off twenty minutes ago,” a trainer informs us. He’s the same tall man who held Bex’s harness when she charged James and me. Rohan, I believe is his name.
“Good,” my father says. When the trainer’s face blanches, he continues with, “I need to see what’s going on with her.”
