I open my mouth. Nothing comes out, though I do mouth a single word:How?
I circle with my finger all around me, referencing the hidden cameras that are in here somewhere.
He shakes his head. “Nothing as obvious as that. I knew you’d pull something like this the moment you realized my property had foxglove growing on it. I was waiting because only someone who has strong feelings for me would try to kill me.”
I stare at him.
“Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But it’s true. I want your love. I’ll take your hate. It’s your indifference that’s fucked me up all these years… you acting like I didn’t exist when you’ve been my whole fucking world. NowI’m your world, and I have all the time I need to convince you to love me. And you know how that starts?”
I have no fucking clue.
“By showing you that you’re safe here. When I say there isn’t anything you can do that’ll make me stop loving you, I mean it.”
I’m not sure what he means by that, but before I can glare at him, hoping for an explanation, he surprises me by trading thefoxglove for his quickly cooling—and possibly poisoned—mug of coffee.
“Bottom’s up,” he says, tilting the mug back and swallowing it in big gulps.
I watch, horrified, as his Adam’s apple bobs. That’s not just a tiny sip to catch my attention. Fuck, no. As if he needs to prove something, he downs the mug in five big swallows.
Connor sets the empty cup on the table, and when he sees my expression, his gentles.
"Whatever happens now? I promise you, Haven… to have you here with me? Where you belong? Fuckingworthit."
He moves toward me, wiping his hands on his pants before reaching down again, taking one of my hands in his.
“I can’t let you go. Understand? Now that I have you, I’ll die without you. You’re the only thing keeping me alive.” He strokes my cheek with the other hand, deranged affection twisting his features, promise in his deep blue eyes. “And if you want to try to kill me, go ahead. Because I won’t let you leave me so long as I’m still alive.”
He’s serious, too. It isn’t often that Connor Heyward doffs his teasing mask, showing the dark, dangerous side to him… but it’s here now, and all I can do is nod.
Because he means it. The only way I’ll be free of him is to truly kill him, and if the foxglove doesn’t do the job, I’ll have to come up with another plan. Not more poison. He’ll be expecting that now. But something else…
If I want to be free of him.
But considering the way my heart leapt into my throat to see Connor drink the coffee like that? I’m suddenly not so sure that Ido.
TWENTY
INSANE
CONNOR
The worst part about being mildly poisoned isn’t the nausea that comes with it.
It isn’t the cold sweats, or the way my ass is killing me from the squirts.
It isn’t even the first few hours of vomiting up my breakfast, my coffee, and everything else including what I might’ve had at the cafeteria my first day at Harmony Heights High, it’s that powerful.
Nope. It’s the fact that, in between wiping the corner of my mouth with the back of my hand and shoving the sweat out of my eyes, I can’t stop fucking smiling even as I groan, pushing away from the spot in front of the toilet and leaning my forehead against the cool tile of my upstairs bathroom wall.
I’m an idiot. I know I am. Being around Haven makes me stupid, and there’s a part of me that’s still that dumb teenaged kid who wants to do something wild and reckless to impress the prim and proper Offering girl who consumed his thoughts and starred in all of his dreams.
When I saw the coffee on the table, then followed her nervous peek over to the window… to the purple flowers outside of it… I instinctively guessed what she had done. Honestly? My biggest shock was that she hadn’t tried something like thissooner. The Haven I adore would have, and I needed to know that she was in there, deep down, after all.
Now, did I kind of, sort of plant the seed in her head before I lost mine and kissed her? Of course I did. Haven needed an outlet for all of the rage brewing inside of her, and I’m the perfect target for her to take it out on. I would’ve much rather she make her attempt with foxglove than try to stab me with my own knife again. I can survive a little poison. A gut shot or a slit throat wouldn’t be so easy to get past.
I’m definitely poisoned. Not dead, though I’m regretting showing off as much as I did. I could’ve made my point—that I encourage her to act out a little because damn if I want my Haven cowering like a mouse—by taking a few sips of the doctored coffee. What did I do? Drank down the entire mug, and I’m paying for it now.
You know what, though? Seeing that horrified look on her pretty face… I wasn’t kidding. It was so worth it. I pushed her to try to kill me, but when I called her bluff by drinking the coffee, I saw fear. I saw concern.
