“Say yes, baby,” he whispered, taking my hand to his lips, then holding it gently. “I’ve never wanted anything in my whole life as much as I want you.” His eyes darkened with desire, seeding fire in my blood.
“Yes,” I whispered, unable to resist, clinging to the impossible dream for just a little while longer. A smile bloomed on my lips as he slipped the ring onto my finger. Then I stood, still holding on to his hand, and lost myself in his arms, melting under the heat of his passionate kiss.
Defense Attorney Blake:Dr. Leishman, you’ve spent years studying and treating victims of childhood sexual abuse. Can you tell us about the impact such trauma has on a person’s ability to form intimate relationships?
Dr. Kristen Leishman:The effects of childhood sexual abuse are profound and long-lasting. Victims often carry the scars into adulthood. They seek connection like anyone else, but their bodies and minds carry the memory of the abuse, manifesting in moments of intimacy.
Defense Attorney Blake:What does that mean, exactly, Doctor?
Dr. Kristen Leishman:When faced with intimacy, their body often reacts instinctively—pulling away, shutting down, or feeling intense fear or revulsion.
21
The Truth
The fountains started a new show, on Ed Sheeran’s “Perfect.” Winston must’ve arranged the song, because it was an incredible choice for the moment, and the timing was impeccable. With his arm wrapped around my shoulders, we stood and watched for a few seconds, swaying with the music. Then he took my hand, and we started slow dancing right there on the patio, by our table.
When the show ended, the champagne bottle was uncorked with a loud pop. The server filled our flutes before stepping back without a word.
Winston kissed my hand and led me to my seat. “You are my soulmate. You know that, don’t you?”
I raised my glass in a silent toast. “No, that’s not true,” I said as seriously as I could manage, but I wasn’t fooling him. “You’re mine.” I meant every word. And while I sipped a bit of champagne, I again allowed myself to wonder,What if?
What if it was possible for me to have a life with the man I loved? What if I could stop running?
“I have some items preordered,” he said, shooting a quick glance at the waiter. “Carpaccio, risotto, tagliolini, or we could order whatever you’d like.”
He stopped talking for a moment, while I fought dark demons emerging from the depths of my mind and demanding I eat everything he’d preordered and more.
“I had a hard time explaining what an engagement lunch was.” He chuckled. “They’d never heard of it.”
I laughed, welcoming the distraction. “Yes, everybody does proposals over dinner, right?”
“We’re not everybody, are we?” He squeezed my hand and smiled. “We don’t follow the crowds or fall into set patterns of behavior. We’re trailblazers, you and I, and we love the sun.”
“Then you won’t mind if I say no to your carpaccio,” I said quickly. “A bit of dessert should do it. Some tiramisu, if they have it. It goes really well with champagne.”
He beckoned the waiter and ordered. A few minutes later, I was tasting a piece of the most exquisite pastry soaked in the finest coffee and liqueurs, and layered with rich, creamy chocolate mousse and whipped cream. It melted in my mouth. I ate silently, my thoughts racing, my anxieties catching up with me and ripping me apart.
“What’s wrong?” Winston asked. “You’re frowning.”
“Does she know?” I asked. His eyebrows shot up in surprise, but then he looked away. “Does your wife know you’re divorcing her?”
“The lawyers are working on it,” he replied, still avoiding my gaze. “I know it’s not what you want to hear, and I apologize. I just couldn’t wait any longer. I wanted you to know how much you mean to me.”
I patted my lips with the napkin and pushed my plate aside, unfinished. “So, she could see pictures of us on her socials somewhere and wouldn’t know why—”
“It’s not like that, I swear,” he said, reaching for my hand. Reluctantly, I let him squeeze it. “We haven’t been happy together for a long time. She and I discussed separation many times.”
That explained the way Claire had been clutching his arm in those photos. She wasn’t afraid of losing him; sheknewshe was losing him and was trying to hold on, to delay the inevitable.
I stood, not even finishing my champagne, and looked at the diamonds that adorned my finger. “I need to go and take care of something for a few hours. I have a prior appointment I can’t cancel.”
Standing, he looked back at me in dismay. “This isn’t going how I’d envisioned it.”
I stroked his face and smiled playfully, tilting my head. “And how was that?”
“You and I, wrapped up in each other in my suite at the Cosmopolitan, having drinks, enjoying some peace and quiet away from the world. And, perhaps, a night to remember.” His eyes darkened with desire. It did things to me ... things I didn’t know how to handle. Things that drove me insane. He drew closer, putting his hands on my waist. “I’ve wanted this ... wanted you—”
