“I’ll leave ye, but the moment ye are dressed, I intend to step back inside this room.”
Relief washed over me, and I loosened the grip on my breasts just a bit.
“Whatever for?”
“To kiss ye, lass. To kiss ye until every memory of Henry’s lips on ye are washed clean from yer mind. Ye doona mind his touch. I could see it in the way ye leaned into his kiss yesterday. ’Twas not like Seumas’ kiss where ye tolerated it simply to torture me. Part of ye enjoys Henry’s touch. I canna sleep until I know I’ve changed that.”
I couldn’t tell if I began to tremble in anticipation or from the cooling water, but when Jerry stepped out into the hallway, I was trembling all over.
I dried myself quickly and glanced around the room with terror over what I should dress in. A full gown was foolish this late in the evening—to place on my nightgown was inviting trouble.
With Henry, I wouldn’t have dreamed of it. With Jerry, it was all I wanted.
For with him, even trouble seemed relatively safe. He would protect and cherish me, and it was all I’d wanted for months.
Taking a breath for courage, I slipped on my sleeping gown and opened the door to let him inside.
Chapter 27
“Do ye wish me to leave, lass? I doona…” Jerry reluctantly pulled his hand away from my leg, allowing my nightgown to fall back toward the ground. He lay his forehead gently against my own, his breathing ragged, his voice pained. “If ye doona want this, send me away from here. I want too much from ye—things ye may not be ready to give.”
He was perilously close to doing so much more than just kissing any memory of Henry from my mind. In truth, he’d already succeeded. I would never be able to kiss or look at Henry the same way again, but Jerry was holding on to his resolve to be respectful of me with so much fervor it was physically painful for him.
My mind had been made up the moment I opened the door. There was no turning back—not this night—quite possibly, not ever.
I reached up and placed my palms on his face, lifting his head up so I could look at him. Leaning forward, I whispered in his ear.
“What is it ye want, Jerry? Tell me. I want to know.”
He pulled back, his face suddenly serious.
“Did ye sleep with him, lass? Ye doona seem…” He faltered, searching for the right words. “Well, ye doona seem like a nervous virgin.”
I smiled and kissed him gently on the cheek before stepping away to stand across from him.
“Jerry, ye have met Mary, havena ye? I learned much about what happens in the beds of lovers at a far younger age than was proper. I know what this night can be between us. I wouldna have let ye inside this room if I dinna want it. Ye were right that night ye came into my bedchamber after I kissed Seumas. I wasted my first kiss. I doona wish to waste this.”
His expression softened as he exhaled a deep, shaky breath.
“Ach, thank God, lass. I dinna know for certain. I hoped,” he paused and raked his hand through his hair. “God, I hoped, but with the way the lad looks at ye, I worried ye’d bedded him.”
He stepped toward me, reached for my hands, and pulled me hard against him, whispering into my ear as I allowed my front to press against his chest.
“Ye do know I love ye, doona ye, lass?”
I trembled as his lips touched my neck. When his hand cupped my breast, I moaned.
“I hoped. I dinna know.”
His hand slid from my chest, up my neck, and to my face where he held me gently, his thumb sweeping soft strokes over my cheek.
“I have loved ye since I opened my eyes in that riverbed to see ye staring at me with those wide, green eyes. For so long, I wondered why this happened to me—why I was chosen to fall through time and leave everything in my old life. The moment I saw ye, I knew. We were meant for one another.”
Why had I kept the truth from him? His absence was no excuse. I’d known long before that, but for so long I tried to deny it myself. Did the spell Grier and I cast so many years ago make our love for one another any less real? I worried that maybe it did. Or at the very least, that Jerry would believe it did.
Could I confess my love for him while holding this secret? Not if I wanted to sleep easily at night.
The feel of his lips across my collarbone begged me to surrender to the sensation, to relinquish my need to tell him what I knew.
