“Ye must hear me, Morna. I doona believe I will survive the child’s birth. Where will Alasdair and Eoin be if we both leave them?”
“What?” Horror washed over me making me dizzy at Elspeth’s suggestion. It was absurd for her to even allow herself to think it. I pulled my hand away and grabbed her shoulders, shaking them gently as I yelled at her. “Doona say anything like that again, Elspeth.”
“My denying it will help nothing. Yer father knew, ye know? He knew that death was coming for him.”
Glimpses of him tucking me into bed flickered through my mind. I knew Elspeth was right—he’d suspected he would be gone soon, and he wanted to make his peace with me before he was.
“What does Father have to do with any of this?”
“I know how he felt because I feel it now, and ye are the only one I mean to tell. Ye must promise me not to tell Alasdair.”
Just like with the news of her pregnancy, there was no reason for her to feel the need to ask me not to say anything to him. I would do anything to keep my brother from pain. There was no way Elspeth could possibly know for certain she would die in childbirth, and I wouldn’t worry my brother over something that would very likely turn out to be irrelevant.
“O’course, Elspeth, but ye must not give in to this feeling ye have. Ye must try to stay strong. We all need ye.”
Tears fell freely down her face. She was still so stunning that I found myself jealous of her even with her face splotched red.
“I know ye feel ye must go now, but will ye try to be back for the birth in three months’ time? If I am to die, ye will need to be here for Alasdair’s sake. He can bear so much, but this would test him in a way I doona believe he’s prepared for.”
I would go to MacNeal Castle and make preparations for my wedding, but there was no way I would possibly miss the babe’s birth now.
“I’ll be back in two, Elspeth, and all will be well. Ye will see.”
Chapter 36
“Did ye not wish to say goodbye to Jerry, lass? I know the two of ye were verra good friends.”
Henry asked the question two days into our ride, catching me off guard and forcing me out of the silence I’d enjoyed for the entirety of our trip.
I shook my head but kept my gaze ahead. “We were not so verra close.”
“’Tis no matter.” Henry paused, and I could see him looking at me expectantly out of the corner of my eye.
“Why is that?”
“He will be joining us in a fortnight. I heard that yer brother no longer required his services so I asked if he wished to work for me at MacNeal Castle. He agreed as long as his sister could live with him.”
Mary snorted behind me. While I worked hard to remain emotionless, this sudden news nearly caused me to fall off my horse.
Whirling my head toward him, my voice gave too much away. “He what? He’s coming to work as yer servant?”
Henry nodded, and I noticed that his expression was rather furious. I wondered if he’d heard rumors about Jerry and me and my reaction had only confirmed them in his mind.
“Aye, lass. He and his sister.”
I couldn’t stop myself. The words ground their way through my teeth against my will.
“She is not his sister.”
Henry waved a hand dismissively as if he already knew that.
“In truth, I doona care what she is to him. I see no reason to judge a man for how he lives his life in private as long as he does good work for me. I watched Jerry at yer brother’s home, and he is a fair worker. I canna imagine why Alasdair saw a need to get rid of him.”
His tone was accusatory. I saw no need to escalate the situation further.
“How many days until we reach home?”
I intentionally refrained from labeling MacNeal Castle as only his home. I hoped my inclusive wording of the question would cause him to relax.
