If you can’t respect me, then I’m not staying here. I don’t have to listen to you anymore.
And the one that made my mother look like I’d broken her heart.You’ve never paid attention to me enough to know me, anyway.
That last one still makes my heart clench. What was I thinking?
Sure, as the youngest of four I’d felt overlooked. When my parents tried to forbid me from seeing Tucker, I lashed out. But I took it too far and I couldn’t un-ring that bell.
Are there enough apologies to make up for the way I left? Or is that the sort of insult passing time doesn’t erase? A sharp pain in my lips lets me know I’ve been biting them together. I force myself to loosen my jaw and take a breath.
Maybe…maybe it’s better if I don’t call.
Wiping away the moisture on my cheek, I set the phone back on the table. Then I stand in front of the cabinets, unseeing, as memories from last night wash over me.
The rough way Milo fucked me. His fingers tugging at my hair. The sting of his flesh hitting mine. The explosive orgasm.
Most of all, the weight of him against me when I fell asleep.
God. Why am I still blinking away tears?
Maybe because Tucker hardly ever spent the night. Even when he came to stay at the beach house, he stayed in his own room or stayed up late working in his office. My snoring kept him awake, he’d said.
Milo didn’t complain. Maybe it hasn’t been long enough yet.
Then again, Tucker never tried to kill me. I keep trying to tell myself I shouldn’t trust Milo because of that, and I don’t think I do. But at least he’s been up-front about it.
When he was supposed to kill you, he saved your life. He brought food for Iggy. He gave you half his sandwich. It was the best sex you’ve ever had.
For the first time in a long time, I can feel a smile spreading across my face.
Reaching into the cabinet, I pull out a bag of rice. Maybe I don’t have a lot of practice with cooking, but I can read directions. Hopefully, Milo will be back soon. And when he gets here, I’ll have food waiting.
11
Notes:
Sorry this chapter is late. I got chased by a gator, and did you know they can run really fucking fast? Anyway, I tripped and fell into traffic. Got hit by a car. Fractured my tibia.
Milo
It’s late when I get back to the cabin. Part of me expects Rowan to be gone.
Part of me wants him to be.
Because I want an excuse to chase him down? Because leaving him passed out and debauched on a faux fur rug took more effort than it should have? I’m not sure. Either way, I’m surprised when I enter slowly to find the lights on and a quiet hum coming from the kitchen.
More surprising? The smell of cooking food.
“Hey, you’re back.”
The counter is a mess of dishes. Steam rises from a pot on the stove. The scent reminds me I haven’t eaten all day. My stomach’s urgent growl is followed quickly by a sinking sense of dread.
“You…cooked?” Not that it’s an unfamiliar concept, but I hadn’t given the idea much thought. I’m not used to worrying about another person. I figured I’d grab something after I checked in here, but now I’m realizing I didn’t actually know if there was food here when I left, and I probably should have.
I definitely should have. Coming home to a warm kitchen and a cooked meal is the sort of thing that gets too comfortable, too fast.
Rowan’s shy smile is alarmingly endearing on a guy his size. “Tried to, anyway. It’s pretty simple. I don’t cook much.” A hint of sadness crosses his expression before a more thoughtful one takes its place. “I realized I didn’t know what you like and there weren’t a lot of options here. But I made rice. Well, I burned the first batch, but the second one seems like it came out okay. And I found some canned beans and some canned vegetables. I remembered how to make baked beans, which my mom mostly prepared by adding brown sugar, ketchup, and paprika to canned beans. I don’t believe that’s the proper method for making them but that’s what she did. Anyway, I couldn’t find paprika, so…” He shrugs as if unsure what to say next.
The way he looks at me. As if he’s seeking approval. There’s tension in every line of his body. If I pissed on his parade right now, it would wreck him. Even if he thinks it wouldn’t.
