“No, it’s fine. I was just surprised.” I stroked her head softly. “She’s lovely.” I buried my head in her fluffy neck and closed my eyes at her answering purr. I had forgotten how much I missed her, and how much of my old life I didn’t realize I longed for.
He inclined his head. “Don’t let my sister hear you say so. Jalebi tends to attack anyone else who comes her way. The cat is a bit feral.”
I bristled at his derisive tone. “Why do you have her, then?”
He paused, a slight smile on his face. “She belonged to someone I once knew and I wanted to make sure she had a home.”
I couldn’t stop the scowl from crossing my face.
She would have her true home if you hadn’t arrested me, you selfish bastard.
“That’s so thoughtful of you,” I said through gritted teeth. I probably looked as feral as Jalebi.
He rubbed the back of his neck, as if suddenly self-conscious. “Anyway, this is what I wanted to show you.”
He handed a box to me and I put Jalebi down on the bed. She gave a mewl of protest, but I turned my attention to the intricate wooden chest. It was much like the one he had given me in his bedroom before, except this box was larger and unwrapped.
“A gift?” I asked, my voice wary. I remembered his last one, something I thought I would treasure forever. Instead, it was a reminder of his betrayal, and its cold bite still rested against my chest.
“Of sorts. I found it when I was in the south dealing with the rebellion there last week.” He gave me a rueful smile. “It reminded me of you.” His voice was soft, almost as if he daren’t speak the words.
Inexplicably, heat rose in my belly, and my chest felt as if it would burst.
I wanted to cut out my treacherous heart and throw it on the carpet.
It wasn’t me he was speaking to, but Sanaya. It wasn’t me he thought about, but the creature I had created. And still, my face flushed with his attention, my pulse beat wildly. It was as if my heart couldn’t reconcile with my head and it was the thing controlling all my emotions. I tried to cut it off, as if I could stop the flow of blood to the organ lodged in my chest that was the reason for all my weakness. But still, my fingers shook as I opened the box.
Inside a dagger blazed, smooth camel bone fashioned into a cobra head, an elegant curved blade with a silver filigree sheath.
A knife. He’d given the girl who wore jewels a blade just like he’d given the swordfighter a necklace. At least he was consistent in his contrariness.
“I don’t know what to say.” My voice was trapped. “It’s beautiful.”
Beautiful was too inadequate a word. The camel bone was polished to gleaming, the cobra so detailed I could nearly feel its scales beneath my fingers.
“I knew you’d like it.” He watched me with dark eyes, his expression closed. I shut the box with a thud that echoed between us. I swallowed past the thickness in my throat, past this uncomfortable sensation I couldn’t quite put my finger on. It couldn’t be guilt, not when he had done so much to me. Not when he deserved what I was about to do to him.
“I love it,” I bit off, knowing I had to say something in response.
It was a lie, and I could hear it in my words. Because right then, I hated that knife with every inch of my skin. I hated that it made me think of him as human, as someone who buys something thoughtful for someone he’s thinking about. And mostly, I didn’t know whether I wanted to kiss him for giving it to me or wrap my fingers around the hilt and plunge it into his chest.
Mazin moved closer, his dark presence like a shadow, the relief of shade on a hot day. I put the box down and pressed my gloved palms intomy thighs, my thoughts a riot of confusion. For one moment I closed my eyes to make everything stop, and I savored the sudden silence.
And in it, I heard that voice again.
Revenge.
My hands burned from where the dark curling stains were. This time, the voice was a soft whisper. It sounded suspiciously familiar, though I couldn’t place it exactly. And since no one else ever heard it but me, I’d come to realize the voice was coming from inside my head.
But it was so hard to remember I was here for revenge when Mazin surrounded me with all the memories that had made me love him.
My eyelids fluttered open and Mazin came back into view.
I needed to trust my gut. That was the one thing that had gotten me through every battle, every fight.
I leaned into him, savoring the familiar between us. In his room, surrounded by him, surrounded byme.
Then his hands, those calluses on my shoulders, cupping my jaw.
