On the day of his audition, I made him a hot breakfast.If I was auditioning, I wouldn’t be able to eat anything, but he never turned down food.I guess going hungry so often did that to you.We didn’t have sex that morning, because he wanted to hold off so he’d be keyed up for his audition, hoping it would boost his performance.We were opposites that way.I didn’t eat when I wasn’t hungry, because I knew there’d always be food when I got hungry.But with sex, I’d spent so long wanting it and not being able to have it that I didn’t turn down sex when I could have it.I guess, because he’d been in a relationship ever since he was a teenager, he didn’t mind waiting.
He didn’t want me to go to the venue with him, because he said he needed to focus, but he told me to meet him when he was done.So I practiced my tap for a couple hours before having a shower.Our flight was the next morning, so I spent the rest of the day doing laundry and cleaning the apartment to burn off my excess energy.Something was bugging me.I wasn’t sure if I was worrying he wouldn’t get the part or worrying he would or worrying what my parents would think if he did, and they saw him naked on TV.
At two o’clock, I headed downtown.I arrived way too early and had to wait outside the building where he was auditioning.And he was late.I started to worry that something bad had happened.But then he came out the doors, looking dazed.He stopped walking and just stood there, staring off into space.
“Are you okay?You look like you walked into a wall.”
He blinked.“That’s what it felt like.”
He looked at his phone.
“What are you doing?”
“Trying to find out about someone.”
“Who?”
He didn’t look up.“I can’t tell you.I’m not supposed to say anything till they announce who’s been cast.”
“How did your audition go?”
“Fucking amazing.Then fucking horrible.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I read with one person, and it was unbelievable.I’ve never clicked with anyone like that before.It was magic.Then I read with someone else, and it was so badIwouldn’t have cast me.And the second person is a huge star.”
“Who is it?”
“I can’t tell you, but you’ve heard of her.She’s a big enough name they’re not going to pick me over her.But that first guy I read with...fuck.I’ve never acted that well in my life.So I dunno what to think.”
Suddenly, I wanted him.
I put my arm around him.“Let’s take an Uber home.”
“You in a hurry?”
“Yeah, actually.Aren’t you?”
“I’m kinda thrown after those auditions,” he said.
“I can take your mind off that.”I leaned in close.“I really want to kiss you right now.You look like a lost little boy.”
“I feel like a lost little boy.”
“Then come home with me, and let me take care of you.”
I called an Uber, and we arrived at our building in twenty minutes.Less than a minute later, we were making out hard in the elevator.I had him pushed into the corner, pressing against him.
“You gonna make it to the apartment?”he said.
“I wanna make it right here.”
The elevator pinged, and we pulled apart as the doors opened.I was about to go out, but he grabbed my coat sleeve, and I realized we were only on the seventh floor.Then this elderly woman got in.I looked at Eddie over her head as the elevator went up.His eyebrows bobbed at me, and he pulled his coat closed.The lady got off on the ninth floor.At the tenth floor, when the elevator doors opened, we raced up the hallway.When we got to the apartment door, I piled into him and pinned him.
“Porter checks McCreevy into the boards,” I said.
We laughed breathlessly.Then I pressed up against him from behind and held him by the collar of his coat.
