I huff out a sound that might have been a laugh if it wasn’t so tainted by panic. “The kind that doesn’t go away.”
“Are you safe?” she asks immediately.
“Yes. Yes, I’m safe. It’s not—” I shake my head, even though she can’t see me. “It’s not like that.”
“Then what is it?”
My eyes move to the test on the counter and the two pink lines. “I’ve been nauseous today and feeling tired for a few weeks.”
The phone rustles as she asks Caleb to take care of Little C, and she finds somewhere more private.
“Did you take a test?”
Neither of us speaks for a moment. She doesn’t need to ask, but she does anyway, with a gentle voice that makes my throat burn.
“Yes.”
“And?”
I swallow. “It’s positive.”
Joelle exhales slowly. “Okay.”
“You won’t freak out?” I ask.
“Do you need me to?”
“No.”
“Then I won’t.”
I let out a tight breath as my shoulders relax a fraction. “Okay,” I whisper, though the word doesn’t sound nearly as measured coming from me.
“Listen to me,” she says, her voice softening. “We’re going to take this one step at a time. You’re not alone in it.”
My throat tightens again. “I know.”
“Do you?”
I hesitate. “Not really.”
“Well, you should,” she says. “You’ve got me. AndWade and Caleb. We’ll figure it out.”
I nod, even though she can’t see it. “Okay.”
“Do you know…?” she asks.
I close my eyes again.
“No.”
“Have you been with anyone since…”
She doesn’t say their names. She doesn’t have to.
“No.”
“Have you told them?”
