Dalton didn’t interrupt, which was exactly why I kept talking.
“I keep thinking about him being here with all that hate for me just because of who I love,” I went on. “Whatam I supposed to do with all this now? I don’t—” I stopped, jaw tightening. “I don’t know if I’m getting it right.”
“He left you the ranch,” Dalton pointed out, and I knew he was right, but maybe he just didn’t ever think to change his will. I bet wherever he was now, he was pissed.
I shifted on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipping under my weight. “It doesn’t feel like it’s any part mine. It feels like I’m making everything worse. The ranch, the sale, Jesse?—”
“Ah,” Dalton cut in. “There it is.”
I closed my eyes briefly. “Don’t.”
“You said his name like it personally offended you.”
“He’s impossible,” I said, and sighed. “But I keep getting it wrong with him.”
“Wrong how?”
I hesitated, then shook my head even though he couldn’t see it. “Doesn’t matter.”
“Lucas.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I said, more firmly—and then it did, all of it, tumbling out before I could stop it. “We slept together. Jesse and I. And then, I ruined it with a stupid joke, and now I don’t know what the hell is happening because I want him really badly and that makes no sense because I’m destroying his life and I’m leaving in a few months and why do I feel like I’m messing up the most important thing in my entire fucking life!”
There was a beat of silence.
“Wait,” Dalton said slowly. “You and sexy-cowboy did the horizontal tango?”
I dragged a hand over my face. “Please never say that again.”
“Oh my God,” he went on, ignoring me. “You slept with him? When were you going to tell me?”
“I wasn’t,” I muttered. “Because it wasn’t—It just happened.”
“Was it good? Was he good? Are you doing it again? Will?—”
“I said something dumb, and now he’s shut down, and I don’t know where I stand.”
“Okay,” Dalton said, tone shifting, amusement easing into something steadier. “What did you say?”
“Something about the sex being so good it might persuade me not to sell.”
“Holy shit, Lucas. You idiot.”
“I know. I just… I don’t know how to be here. Not properly.”
There was a pause on the line, then Dalton said, quieter, “You don’t have to have it figured out already.”
“I kind of do.”
“No,” he said. “You don’t. Apologize to Jesse.”
“I tried.”
“Okay, then do the next thing. That’s it.”
“The next thing,” I echoed.
“Yeah. Whatever’s in front of you.”
