And he chose me back.
“I’m coming,” he gasps, and his hips stutter again. I feel his dick kick between my thighs, and just as he lets out a sobbing cry, his phone begins to ring a shrill, familiar tone.
His mother’s calling.
He’s too far gone to stop his orgasm, but I know his pleasure is interrupted because his cock softens almost immediately after he comes, and he sags against me. The next noise he makes is another sob, but it’s not one of pleasure.
“Why?” he breathes against my chest.
I hold him tightly as his phone goes silent, then starts to ring again. He hasn’t really seen his mom much since I’ve been here with him, but I know the alert he’s set for her on his phone.
And I know what it costs him every time he hears it.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
I shake my head and hold him tighter. “It’s fine. I’m not going anywhere.”
Normally, he takes the phone into the other room, but this time, I pull him back to bed, and he doesn’t fight me on it. He taps her contact, closes his eyes, and lets his body collapse against mine as the line begins to ring.
“Hey, Mom,” he says when she picks up. “I’m in the middle of something. Can I call you back lat?—”
“North. It’s an emergency!” She’s yelling loud enough for me to hear it. “I need you right now!”
TWENTY-THREE
NORTH
I hate her.
Okay, I don’t hate her, but sometimes it feels like I do. She’s ruined another good moment in my life. Her presence ruined any chance we had to bask in the afterglow of making love—because that’s what it had been. It was just as intense as before, just as hot, but the weight of Leo knowing how I feel about him sat heavily between us, and I know it meant something to him.
I think if I’d been given more time, he would have been able to tell me how he feels about me too.
I can tell he’s scared.
Hell, he’s not the only one terrified of being vulnerable in this relationship. It’s hard coming into his life and competing with a ghost. I have no idea where I stand. I have no idea if I will ever live up to those old memories of his first love.
I have no idea if there’s actually space for me in his broken heart.
But tonight might have been something if I’d been allowed to have a quiet moment with him after. Instead, in the height of pleasure, the sound of her call destroyed it, and now I’mwashing the scent of Leo off me as he gets dressed in the other room.
The difference is, tonight I won’t be alone when I go see her. When Leo insisted on riding along with me, I decided to let him. As horrifying as it will be, knowing he’s seeing all the ugly, sharp edges of my life, it’s better that he know what it’s like sooner rather than later.
He needs to catch a glimpse of where I came from and the obligations I have toward her because, for the moment, my mom isn’t going anywhere.
I don’t want to bring more chaos into Leo’s life, but I also need him to understand this part of me, and maybe he’ll be the one who can accept all the unpleasant, raw, ugly pieces that make up who I am.
I feel a little woozy as I step out of the shower, but I know it’s anxiety. I’d rather be in pajamas in bed, curled up in Leo’s arms, but it is what it is.
I catch one last glance of myself before heading into the living room, where Leo is waiting, and the nervous feeling in the center of my chest calms a bit when I see him. He looks so fucking sweet, sitting there on the couch in tight sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt. His hair is askew—more curly than it normally is—and he looks up at me with his gorgeous eyes.
“Ready?” he asks.
I should be the one asking him that, but I offer him a smile anyway, and then my hands, which he takes so I can haul him to his feet. He leans into my chest, pulling me into a kiss, and my entire body relaxes.
“Wow. I think I needed that.”
He laughs as he kisses me one more time. “Me too.”
