Where I’m sitting right now, the process feels overwhelming.
“I can help,” Gage offers, and I feel even worse.
He can’t help me with my teacher certification stuff after camp ends because he won’t be part of my life anymore after camp ends. That boundary line between summer and after summer, also known as the dreaded post-Gage era, looms heavy in my mind.
Right now, I have a job. I have Gage. I’m happy. Why spoil that with thoughts of a jobless, Gageless future?
“Oh, well.” I paste on a smile and toss my hair. “I don’t have to worry about it now.”
Gage persists. “No, but—”
I cut him off. “Thanks, Gage,” I say dismissively, patting his arm.
He closes his mouth, understanding my message that the subject is closed.
I’d much rather dwell on the here and now, and the earlier today, when Gage was kissing me like he would never get enough.
My thoughts back up even more as I say goodbye to Gage and walk back to my cabin. I remember that I agreed to go to the Carters’ Fourth of July party in Austin next weekend. It’s been years, and as nervous as I am about being with Gage, and acting indifferent or evenfriendlytoward him, in the midst of our families and friends, I’m also excited. My parents will be there. And Annie. The Carters have always been a second family to me, Gage the only member I’ve avoided over the last five years.
While I’m thinking about it, I pull out my phone to text Annie.
Olivia:
I’m coming to the July 4 party next weekend!
Annie:
You ARE?
Olivia:
yes, driving over with Gage
Annie:
Why did you say no when I asked you?
Olivia:
my schedule changed. And apparently, your mom and dad want me to come
Annie:
Oh, I see. But when it was ME who wanted you to come… [wink face emoji]
I chuckle but feel guilty about how unknowingly on the nose she is. When Annie asked me to come home for the party, I said I couldn’t. But when Gage asked me … let’s just say he has ways of persuading me that wouldn’t work if his sister tried them.
The week of camp leading up to the Fourth of July is a tiring one for me. I planned special themed activities that the kids loved, but the games ended up being a pain to organize and put on.
So, when Gage and I set out for Austin and the Carters’ party on Saturday, my body is drained, but my mind is spinning. My biggest worry is Annie because she knows both of us too well. She’ll pick up on any little sign of attraction between us and pounce.
As Gage drives his Jeep up the rock-lined road that leads from Camp Prairie Star to the main highway, I warn him about being extra careful in front of his sister.
Without taking his eyes off the road, he says, “I still don’t understand why we need to hide our relationship.”
“Because we don’t have arelationship, remember?” I shoot back.
I watch him clench his jaw, then relax it as he draws in a breath. “Right.”
